SAPNAP'S POV:
TW: Self Harm, Start of ED, Suicidal Thoughts, Cursing, Abuse, Blood
It was finally time for the long awaited Jackbox stream. I just started the stream to the starting soon screen, everyone in the chat was getting hyped up. Finally I streamed after like 3 months (not foreshadowing I swear!!) The stream included Karl, Tommy, Ranboo, George, Dream, Quackity, Wilbur, and I. I tried not to look at the chat much but I saw one message after another. It sent me into shock it was out right disturbing .
h3arts4gogy: Ranboo is so dumb and I hate him get him out of the stream he's ruining it
nexsucks: Ranboo is a bitch who could like him he looks fat and he's probably ugly as hell
toms_sim0ns: Ranboo's humor is weak and so is he
tub_bou: Ranboo looks kinda fat
sqpnapswife: why is everyone here being so mean to Ranboo what did he do?
That's what I asked myself after I read those, what did he do? I can ask him after but I don't think he's done anything. I look back at Ranboo and he slips out his phone "I'm gonna read chat!" he says it with so much cheer. "NO DON'T READ CHAT." I snap. He looks at me confused, "Why not Sapnap?" I take a deep breath in "Look, just don't okay." I state sternly so he knows to not look. He looks at me offended and says "What the heck, just because of that I'm gonna look." His smile turns into an immediate frown. "I should've listened." He says mood faltering. "I'm gonna go now." I can understand why he was leaving. "Hey Babe go check up on Ranboo but leave him alone for like 5 minutes to catch his breath, please." I say my smile starting to fade. "Of course Sappy, I was gonna anyway." Tommy sticks his tongue out. "I'm gonna go with Karl then, but oh my god you guys are so deeply in love!" Carrying out the O as he twirled around mocking us. Karl throws him a look before they start giggling, as the giggles die down the two boys decide they were gonna check up on Ranboo.
RANBOO'S POV:
Maybe I should stop streaming. I mean that type of shit is traumatizing, getting called dumb and everyone saying I shouldn't of been there. Maybe I should've succeeded with death and went back to that cliff to jump off it. Y'know what? I will if what I want to, if the people don't like me there it's sure my friends don't like me either. I'm gonna grab the kni- "Hey Ranboo bud you okay?" I hear Karl say as he opens the door. "No, I'm not." I say truthfully
TOMMY'S POV:
"Do you wanna talk about it?" I say hoping for an answer. "Well I would but I don't wanna ruin your guys' day." Ranboo says quite melancholy. Then he signals for us to enter the room, so Karl and I slide into the room to go and sit my Ranboo on the bed. "Your not gonna ruin our day Ranboo we wanna help you, the only thing that would ruin my day is not being able to help you." Karl says with a cheerful attitude to help Ranboo feel more comforted. "Whatever you say, but I guess I'll tell you. I was gonna look at chat but right before Sapnap stopped me and told me not to, I didn't understand why and he wasn't giving me a reason so I looked anyway. I should've listened because all of chat was making fun of me and being heartless except a few." Ranboo says straight to the point. "Oh, Ranboo that is terrible you really shouldn't listen to what other people say because its most likely not true." Karl says with a sympathetic look on his face, I nod in agreement. "Ranboo we are here for you and I know it'll be hard for you to stop listening and believing what people say is true but you need to work on it." I say hoping Ranboo will try his best.
RANBOO'S POV:
"I can promise I will try my best, but things get to me easily." I say hopefully urging them to leave so I can-. I don't think I have to finish that sentence I'll keep it to myself actually. "Okay well me and Tommy are gonna go now bye Ranboo!" Karl says. "BYEE!" Tommy says loudly as he walks out of the room and shuts the door. I start looking around for anything sharp at all but I think Tommy already beat me to that and took out all the sharp objects from our room. So I start walking to my suitcase. I don't think he would go through my suitcase so my pocket knife must still be in there. This isn't what I thought I'd be using it for but oh well. I walk over to the bathroom and shut the door. Then I lock it.
THIS IS WHERE THE TRIGGER WARNING STARTS!
Am I really sure I wanna do this? Yes I am sure. I flick the knife open with one satisfying swish, the blade look so shiny. I stab the skin on my arm and start cutting multiples times. Good thing I brought a lot of hoodies. I think maybe for 2 seconds that it would be a bad idea but I roll up my jeans anyway. The old cuts are still there but I don't even care. I start making more cuts on my leg and I accidentally cut one too deep earning a quite loud yelp. I just keep cutting it feels so nice. I cut all the way down to my ankles and finally decide that's enough. And those comments in Sapnap's chat were right I may be getting a little fat. I'll use George's tactic and stop eating for a while. My heavy breathes die down and the voices are so loud. It's all Tommy, George, Sapnap, and Karl. My closest friends so I'll listen for a few seconds for what they have to say.
Tommy: YOU'RE USELESS RANBOO.
Yeah, that's true
George: You should listen to the people Ranboo nobody wants you here, just die.
I'm not sure that's true but maybe Karl, Sapnap, George, and Tommy pity me.
Karl: I should've never been your friend.
That burns, am I really not a good person?
Sapnap: I wish you died that night.
That one hurt especially bad. He wished that I had died the night of the cliff incident.
TRIGGER WARNING ENDS HERE.
I hear a knock on the door. "Hello Ranboo you in there? Can you hurry I wanna put on my pj's." Tommy says from outside of the door. "Uh, yeah sorry let me just clean up." I say subconsciously. "Clean up what?" Tommy asks quite concerned. "Oh uh, don't worry about it Tommy." I say quickly panicking. "I'm gonna worry about it what are you cleaning up, I'm serious Ranboo." He says in a definitely intimidating tone of voice. "Uh my cuts," I say quickly. "that I did." I say finishing off the sentence. "Oh Ranboo, If you want I can help you and we can talk about it later." Tommy says hopefully. "Yeah sure I'll unlock the door." I say and quickly get up to unlock the door. I open the door and let Tommy in. The first thing he does is he gives me a hug. "I'm so sorry this is happening Ranboo, I wish you could be happy." There is the word again. Wish, wish. I wish, you wish, they wish, we all wish. I guess I haven't noticed 'til now. "Thank you Tommy." I say then a look of concern haunts my face as I hear him crying, I break the hug to check if he's okay he seems to be fine, then why is he crying? "Sorry Ranboo, its just I care about you so much and I hate that this is happening." Tommy cries out. "Hey its okay its not your fault." I say trying to comfort him. "Thanks Ranboo." He says then he smiles at me, a smile filled with care, joy, sadness, and sympathy. It made my insides light up and feel warm. Like I had a purpose. To keep Tommy as my friend. I smiled back at him.
Blood warning!
Then he grabbed a towel, ran it under cold water, he then grabbed my wrist and started wiping blood off of it. Then he took my other wrist and wiped blood off of it. He handed me the towel. "I'll clean up the floor while you wipe off your legs." He says sweetly. I start wiping the crimson liquid off my legs as Tommy grabs and wets another towel to wipe up the floor. He then started wiping it off the floor. As soon as he was done I was done. Odd timing but whatever. "Give me the towel I'll put it in the wash, and you might wanna change your clothes." Tommy says as I give him the towel.
Blood warning over!
Tommy then walks out of the bathroom to I assume put the towels in the wash. So I wash off the pocket knife and put it back in my suitcase. Then I take out my pajamas put them on the bed and grab a towel to take a shower. I walk over to the bathroom lock the door and walk into the shower. I take a 10-15 minutes shower before I get out and put on my pajamas. I pick up my phone from the nightstand next to the bed and open Youtube. I start watching some videos then Tommy comes back in. He picks up his pajamas from next to the bathroom door and goes in to change.
Word Count:1675
A/N: We don't talk about how long it took me to write this. I was procrastinating, but anyway I really hope you like it! Also get some sleep, eat some food, drink some water. Take care of yourselves and look for happy! I love you stay strong. ^^
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