Who We Are | TWD

.044

I stand in front of the mirror, tracing the remnants of my bruise with my fingers. All that's left are wisps of a yellow and green fog against my cheek. The subtle pain wasn't the reason why the bruise had irritated me so badly. The real problem was the memories it carried with it.

It's been a week since everything happened. I'm more than happy that mostly everything that happened has been left in the past. Of course, I think it's much easier for someone like me to say. It's easier for our entire group to say something like that because none of us were affected. None of us had to say goodbye to anymore members of our group. In fact, it's only been getting better, in my eyes.

Deanna has been having a hard time as far as losing Reg is concerned. I don't blame her and I think she has every right to grieve, but we're losing her. There's days where she simply won't leave her house and Carol will have to go bring her a meal or two a day to help Deanna and Spencer get by.

All her pain aside, I think Deanna needs to seriously let the grief subside for a while so she's able to come back and do her job. We're missing more than just another member of the community because she is Alexandria's leader. She's been letting Rick call most of the shots lately. I can't tell if most of it is from her finally opening her eyes wide enough to see the real word, or if she's just too weak to give her own orders at the moment.

I'm happy for Rick to have been given a bit more credit lately because it's about time it happened. Rick knows what he's doing out there and these people need to trust him. I've trusted him wholeheartedly since the very beginning and look where I am now: alive.

A figure appears in the doorway. As I brush my fingers through my hair to tie it back into a ponytail, I turn to see Carl. "Hey," he says, leaning in the door frame.

"Hey."

"Everyone's leaving now if you want to say bye," Carl says as I secure my ponytail with a hair tie. I had almost forgotten all I about that. The dry run is today.

"I almost forgot," I reply, stepping into the hall and heading for the stairs. Carl follows behind me. Even after all the time that Rick had spent convincing some of the other members of Alexandria to join in on the efforts, create a safe plan that would get the job of emptying the quarry of walkers done, and then explaining the plan in great detail to Carl and I multiple times within the past week, it had still slipped my mind.

I hurry down the stairs and onto the front porch where Daryl and Rick are waiting. "We're leaving," Rick says as soon as I step outside, cradling Judith.

"I know," I respond, giving him a hug. He hugs back with his free arm. Even though it's just a dry run and there's nothing to worry about, I still don't want them to go without saying goodbye. I don't know how I would forgive myself. I've already had to lose people without getting a chance to give them a proper send off, so I don't want to let that happen again.

I move towards Daryl next, giving him a hug, too. "Stay safe," I mutter.

"I will."

"Promise?"

"Promise." I pull back, noticing that Michonne is missing from the equation. I know that she's going. Rick had told Carl and I, but she also reiterated the information to us last night.

"Where's Michonne?"

"She's already at the gates helping load the cars and making sure everyone is ready," Rick sighs.

"Tell her to stay safe, please," I say, wishing she was here for me to say it to her myself. I think about walking towards the gates where I know the cars are already forming a line to escape, but decide it'd be best if I stayed back. I don't want to get in her way and I'm sure she's especially busy right now.