Sleepless Nights ✓

🌑 Chapter III 🌑

SLEEPLESS NIGHTS

CHAPTER THREE

Her body bound so tightly that she cannot move. Like she has been petrified and made into a puppet. The puppet master moving her body by the strings. The darkness has swallowed her. Her eyes see nothing when they open. The fight is harder with each passing day. She grows weaker with every day. Her body thin and frail and sickly. Why death has not yet come knocking on her door, she still does not know. With time she lost all feeling in her fingers and toes for they stayed in the same place for days.

While all feeling has left her, it is the pain and the agony which remains. The pain is her only friend in this horrible silence that surrounds her whole and has become a creature she can barely tolerate. Her throat pains her so deeply that every swallow is like needles are being jammed down her throat. Sometimes she wishes she could scream as loud as she can. The pain and the endless darkness and silence prevents her from doing so as it would do so much. The blood in her veins runs cold and her body shivers. A sound is heard when the door opens...

***

Waking up with a jerk, her hands travel to her throat and begin to scratch at it like a cat. Her fingernails not so long but upon her skin, they are sharp. Pain runs through her body as she scratches harshly against the skin on her throat until she finally stops. Her fingernails damp with blood which she managed to scratch. Her breathing is heavy when she sits up and jerks to turn on the lights in the room. The clock reads that it's only about one in the morning. The hair on the back of her neck stand out.

The fear inside her body as she leans against the wall. Sliding down, tries to control her breathing. The heart inside her chest is pounding like never before, wanting nothing more than to run away from her and be somewhere else. If she could, she would rip her heart out and give it freedom, even if it means that she won't get it. Alas, her heart is stuck in its cage and so is she. She sits down by the wall until she controls her breath but her heart does not calm any time soon.

Karina takes some time to gather herself but when she does, she sits down on her bed and looks at her hands. Under her fingernails and around them is dried blood. What horrors her neck must appear like. What had compelled her to do this to herself had been this sudden feeling that she had to get something out of her throat. Like there had been something in her or on her that she needed to claw out and she tried and tried. The pain becoming worse with each scratch her nails made, but never could she get it out.

Going to the bathroom, she washes her hand, but even she is unable to get rid of all of the blood. Not matter how much she tries. It seems to be stuck under her nails and is stubborn as stubborn can be. She walks to her bedroom and looks through her closet to find this old scarf which is made out of wool. Wrapping it around her neck, the temptation to pull so hard that all air would leave her has never become as much as now. When the wool comes in contact with her open skin, it burns but she ignores it.

Pain is the one thing that she can say she is used to and knows how to deal with. It is the very thing that she hates more than she has ever hated anything. Leaving her small apartment, she walks into the night. The silence makes her almost want to cut off her ears, at least then she would be able to hear something, anything. The sound of the knife coming in contact with her flesh. That sound is what she has heard so many times before, and it would not make it any worse if she heard it again.

The streets are so empty that during the night it looks like a ghost town. There is very little light where she walks and in the shadows she can become invisible. Not certain if that is a good thing or not, something to be wanted or not. The answers not what she would want to know. Karina looks down at the ground as she walks but every so often she would look up to see where she is going. It is not necessary as she already knows where to go even when her gaze is turned downwards.