The ghost of him

Chapter 26

I Don't 't feel so good. I feel like I'm going to hurl. I open my eyes and I am covered in white. I hear talking in the background and I lift my head to grasp my surroundings.

I know I'm not dead. I was breathing, I was hearing, I was seeing, though it was blurry. I saw mom. She was the woman who was crying.

She's going to be so happy to see me. She's going to rush in and give me a big hug, crying saying she missed me and that she was so worried, but also be mad at me, and I'll understand. It will also be very awkward.

"Rose! You're awake!" Dad yells. He rushes over to me and wraps me in a hug so tight I can't breathe. I can tell he's crying because my clothes are getting wet. I look down to see I'm wearing a hospital gown with socks on, the one with the grips at the bottom.

"Alright, alright. Let her breathe." The doctor says. He lets go of me and I take a deep breath because I can breathe again.

"Dad I am so sorry I didn't mean to scare you and I don't know what I was thinking and-"

"It's okay. The important thing is you're alive." His tone suggests it was a joke, but it most definitely wasn't. That is the important thing.

"Thanks, Dad," I say, and I start to have tears of my own.

"I want you to know that I love you. You mean so much to me, and you are worth so much. You are too young and valuable to die. You hear?"

I laugh a little, crying in the process. I guess I'm just so overjoyed that I'm alive, and it means so much to me, what he's saying. I don't even know what I was thinking. How heartbroken dad would be if they didn't save me in time. "I hear you, dad."

"Good. Also, These medical bills are getting expensive." he laughs a little too, but in the end, it turns uncomfortable.

Oh my god. I didn't even think about the medical bills. How mom and dad will have to pay tons of money they don't have because I'm a drama queen. Now I hate myself more than I already do. Stupid, stupid, stupid.

"What's going on?" I ask. I want to know what they're going to do with me. I did the thing that's a one-way ticket to the loony bin, so I'm most likely going there. I look around and see all these machines around me and that makes me even more worried. "What's going to happen to me?"

"Well," The doctor says as he takes off his glasses. "We're going to do some tests-"

"tests?! What tests?!" I say, worried and surprised at the same time. I know this isn't going to be good.

"It's just a few tests to see if you're...healthy. You don't have to be scared," he says as he grabs his clipboard. Too late for that.

"Oh great," I say as I cross my arms. Mom probably put them up to this. Where is mom anyway? I thought she'd burst in and squeeze me tight, judging by the way she was freaking out when they wouldn't let her in. "Hey, where's mom?"

Dad rubs his neck and looks all around, which means there's something he needs to tell me, something bad. Did something happen to her? Did she hurt herself because I hurt myself? Or maybe...

"She doesn't want to see me." I look down at the green bed sheets, voice low, ashamed of myself. "She thought I was doing better and she was so happy but then I go and do this. Of course, she doesn't want to see me. I don't blame her."

"No..." Dad wants to disagree, to come up with an excuse or a half-lie. "Well...yes. She just needs space. She's here though, out in the waiting room, just to know if you're alright."

"Well, that's good," I say with a half-smile. At least she doesn't completely hate me.

"She'll come around soon. Just give her time."