So be it

Torches

I was a fool. And I knew it from the top of my head to the bottom of my soles. I was a fool and acting like one to boot as well.

The worst part of it? I did not care one bit. So be it.

I put muscles and weight into my move and I felt the shoulder under my grip tremble.

"You will not say that again. Am I clear?"

That was me. About as butch as it gets. And I was playing it to the hilt.

"It's the truth!" Amanda squealed.

I gripped her shoulder so tightly, she yelped and tears came to her eyes. I was being a bully but I did not care.

"Am I clear?" I enunciated clearly through gritted teeth.

Jinx's tired voice answered quietly from beside me. "Let it go, Teach. It's alright."

I barely glanced at her. I would expect it from Jinx. That did not mean I had to let it go. I had let it go for too long.

I felt Amanda's bones grit under my hand and I smiled. It was a feral smile but I did not care. "I asked you. Am I clear?"

Amanda's gasp was clearly audible to all. "Yes. Yes!"

Only after the tears had started to flow from her eyes did I release her.

I looked at the women around, my eyes challenging any one of them to dare dispute me in this. I was no leader. That was Gloria's lot in our little group. And I stayed away from most of them most of the time.

But I would not stand still and let that little bitch walk over Jinx. Most certainly I would not stand it as I knew that she was only doing it to hurt Gloria's standing.

I nodded once, more to the air than to any of the others. It was still intimidating though. I started to walk away, away from the circle and from the cold anger that suffused me.

Linda's low tones stopped me. "Are you being the enforcer now, Teach?"

I turned to her, arrogance oozing out of me. I could not take Linda in a fight and I knew it. That did not mean I would back down.

"I won't stand for that shit, officer. And neither should you."

My barb hit home and Linda flinched. I smirked at her and turned away once again. I walked calmly away until I reached the small hut that I called home. I did not step inside, instead taking my customary place on the piece of wood that served me for a stool.

The knife was steady in my hand as I continued the simple labour that Amanda's overheard words had interrupted. I did not look at the others but I kept them in my peripheral vision.

Slowly, ever so slowly, they dispersed back to whatever they had been doing before the confrontation. Amanda stalked away into the woods beyond the campsite but thankfully no one followed her.

I watched carefully as Jinx and Gloria started to walk in my direction. My shoulders bunched instinctively. I did not want to try to explain and it looked like I would have to. I hated explaining myself.

Stupidly I did not even realise that there were others in their wake. My eyes had stubbornly returned to the bone I was trying to carve into a needle. We needed clothes after all, even if they were patchy leather. I was not even certain bone was the best material but I had to try. Needles would make things so much easier.

"Teach." Jinx's low greeting made me stiffen.

Her hand on my shoulder was as always warm, almost gentle. "Don't do this," she said slowly.