Enforcing Boundaries

Bonus Chapter 3 - Switch

Magnus

I opened my mouth and snapped it shut again for the fourth time. Lachlan's fingers continued their smooth glide across his keyboard and I wondered whether he had noticed I was struggling with my words or if he was really that caught up in his work.

I licked my lips and tried again. "Lachlan?"

His typing stopped immediately, which made me think he had been paying attention to me, after all, and just had the grace not to call me out before I was ready to talk. He put his laptop on his desk and turned his chair to face me. "Yes?"

"I, um... I wondered if you wanted to try something."

He looked intrigued, but only mildly. Which meant he hadn't caught the direction of my thoughts in the past few days, ever since I decided this was something I wanted to try. Because if he had any idea of what I wanted to propose, he would probably look a little more upset.

See, I knew how Lachlan felt about bottoming. One night when we traded stories – me of my fantasies and him of his exploits – he'd mentioned having bottomed once ever and decided it wasn't for him.

Was it arrogant if I thought I could make it feel good for him? Probably, especially since the only experience I had was in my mind, and the knowledge of what I liked when he was inside me.

But I really, really wanted to try. Just once. I just wanted to know what it was like.

Lachlan's eyes went soft and he put on a smile that made my chest ache, it was so tender. "Go on and ask," he said gently, in the kind of tone you would use to soothe a while animal.

His soft treatment relaxed me enough to get out the words. "Could I top you?" As soon as I said it, I squeezed my eyes shut. It was too stressful to see his reaction. But I didn't turn off my bond sense, and I could feel that he wasn't at all upset by my words. In fact, he seemed a little... amused? What about this was funny to him?

I opened my eyes to see and saw him smiling fondly at me. His smile widened and he said, "Sure, Magnus."

Wait... really?

It couldn't be that easy. Not after I spent days – days! – worrying about his reaction. In fact, I felt a little put out that I'd gone to all this trouble worrying for nothing.

"What?" I asked, as if I'd misheard him. I knew I'd heard right, but I was having a hard time believing it could be so simple.

He rolled his eyes, though he was still smiling. "Magnus, did you really think I was going to say no?"

Um, yeah, kinda.

He shook his head and continued, "After how generous you've been to me with your body, how could I refuse you this? Besides, this is the only way you'll ever get to try topping, since I know you won't be doing it with anyone else. I figured you'd ask eventually."

"But..." He might have broken my brain, because I really was too flummoxed to string together a cohesive list of all the reasons this conversation was shocking to me.

Lachlan waited for a few long moments before giving up on me saying anything. He turned back to his laptop. I watched him save the file he was working on, then close it out and shut down. "Just give me ten minutes, okay?" he said.

"Um," was my brilliant response.

Lachlan smiled again and kissed my cheek before heading for the bathroom.

I stared at the closed door until the shower started running and I realized he must be planning on this happening now. I wasn't ready! I needed time to prepare. I had way more research to do about how to make this feel good for him. I didn't think I could stand it if he didn't enjoy himself. And he definitely wouldn't want me to try again if I didn't do a good job, right?