Mumbling Lunatic

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Dean took Castiel's car to the nearest bar. He didn't take it for some reason. This only made Dean worse. It was a dive about a mile down the road. It wasn't ideal, but Dean didn't care. He never did. The tears still streamed down. They stung now. They were bullets.

Dean tried to pull himself together when he pulled up to the joint. Wipe the tears. 'Be a man, dammit.' Didn't help much. 'Fuck it,' he thought, 'just get wasted.'
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Around his 7th scotch in he started talking to himself. Choruses of
"How is this my life? How did it get like this?" And "I'm as much a monster as the ones I hunt" he would tell his story to no one, muttering in the corner. He couldn't stop.

At his 8th he started with:

"Why is it so completely impossible for me to be happy? Huh. It's like I am the impossible happy. Yup. That's my new name. Call me that from now own."

At his 9th, he ended with:

"Dean Winchester is dead on the inside. Awesome."

At his 10th, he said this:

"You know the worst thing? I never even got to tell Cas I lov

***Notes: Yes, this is how the chapter ends. Don't worry, it'll make sense in the next chapter, I promise. :)))))

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