Pt.55

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Rue's POV

I've been eating a ton today. Which is unusual, due to my disorder. After I had finished eating, what I think might have been my fifth bowl of cereal. I had started feeling sick.

Yup. It had all came back up.

I hear the front door open, from the kitchen. I hop off the stool and go towards the living room.

"Nadine?"

He turns to me and smiles. "Tesoro." He says and walks over to me. "I missed you." As soon as he pulls me, flush against his body, I smell the alcohol lingering in his breath.

"Why are you being so nice? You're usually- well, you're usually an asshole." From my experience with drunk Nadine, it usually ends up in him being moody and secretative.

He looks down at me with a frown. "I'm sorry if I'm like that." He nuzzles his head into my neck, swooping his arms down to hold my waist. "I love your hair." He whispers, grabbing a piece of it and playing with it. "I love how you smell." His lips trailed down my neck. "I love-"

"What the fuck is happening here?" Alex says, coming down the stairs. I slightly push Nadine away.

"Jesus, it's nothing. He's just a little drunk."

"Yea, well drunk or not, he better keep it in his pants." He pats a hand on Nadine's shoulder, then walks by, going into the kitchen. "And always use protection." He calls out.

I feel my face blush. We don't have to use protection. I'm on the pill. "Lets get you to bed." I mumble, already leading Nadine up to his room.

I have a steady grip on Nadine, as I lead him through the hallway. Making sure he doesn't fall over or pass out. "Come on. This way." I twist the doorknob and make it into his room. I throw him on the bed. It feels like an actual weight has been lifted from my shoulders. I pull the covers back, and let him go under. I pull them up to his chin and start walking away.

I reach for the door, but Nadine's voice cuts me off. "Stay." He demands.

"I can't."

"Please?" He begs. I sigh and go to lay on the bed with him. I keep a very safe distance between us. But just like Nadine, he scoots close so that he can wrap his arm around my waist.

"I'm still mad at you." I whisper. I hear a soft chuckle come from him.

"I expected you to be. I'm still mad, too." His eyes fade from joy, to sadness. "I really don't want you to leave. If you leave-"

"I'll die. I know. But it's better than being stuck in a miserable situation."

He takes in a deep breath, then dramatically exhales.

"I might leave tomorrow." I confess in a whisper. "So tonight. If you could just hold me. Please don't yell, or persuade me. Just hold me."

He stares at me without talking. But then I feel his arms pull me against him. "I'll visit your grave." He whispers sarcastically.

I let out a small laugh and smack his chest. "You'll be surprised when it comes down to you and me."

"I hope it doesn't come down to that at all."

Me neither.

But knowing you. You'll help me out and give me a painless death.

And I love you for that.

But it's also why I hate you.

-

The sun pours into my room, through the cracked curtains. I rub my eyes and realize this is not my bed. I feel myself jolt up and look around the room.

Nadine is gone.

But he left a note on the nightstand.

I pick the sticky note up, and bring it closer so that my eyes can read it.

Sorry to leave the note, but I had to run out and get some things. Kaylee told me you weren't feeling good. Why didn't you tell me? Anyways, I'll be back in a little with some stuff for you.

Please don't leave yet.

Wait for me.

-Nadine Rossi.

I feel myself frown as I re-read the note. I wish things aren't the way they are. But then it wouldn't lead me to him. When I'm with him, it feels like all my trauma somehow goes away. But lately, being around him is making me re-live it.

The training. I remember I couldn't leave the training room until I practically died. My dad would teach me combat, rather than let me attend the school with all the other Mafia kids. Pretty sure my mom convinced him of that. She also convinced him that I attend a public school. Which sucked.

I feel the memories start replaying in my head.

The smack of the stick we used for our Martial arts.

The slice of the knife when my dad would teach me to throw.

My mom was always too scared to watch me and my brother, go against our dad. She knew he wouldn't hold back. Even if we were his children. He didn't care as long as it made us stronger.

Do I think my father loves me?

I'm not sure.

I used to imagine my dad as a happier version. He would pick me up from school, help me bake cookies, watch movies with me, love me.

I will say this about him, though.

He never let me, let myself down.

"Come on, Rue! You're really going to let him knock you down, like that?!" My father screamed as my brother pushed me down. It was the day my dad, for once, made me and my brother go against each other.

My brother stood over me, he wears a sorrowful expression as he watches me get "motivation" from our father. I see him mouth the words to me.

get up.

I knit my eyebrows and look over to my dad. He's angry.

"Don't just stand there, Alex. If she doesn't want to get up. Finish her."

I feel my heart race as Alex nods his head. "I'm sorry." He lifts his foot up, ready to kick my stomach. But I suddenly feel a rush of adrenaline, kick in. I roll onto my side, causing him to miss his kick on me. He gives me a small smile. But it doesn't last long until he comes charging at me. I side kick my leg up towards his face, hitting him in the jaw. He stumbles back and brings his hand to his now, sore, jaw.

"YES, RUE! GREAT JOB, BABYGIRL!" I don't know why. But hearing those words come from my dad, give me confidence. He's impressed with me. he's proud of me. It feels like he loves me.

But it doesn't last long when Alex stands back up, as if nothing affects him. "Come on Alex, you got this." My dad says. He's cheering for both of us. Because we know what happens if you lose.

Me and Alex don't do anything. We circle each other. Waiting for someone to make a move. He lunges towards me, grabbing my arm and twisting it behind my back. I use my free arm, to elbow him on the side. He still doesn't let go of me.

But then I remember a move my dad taught me. I do my best to jump up, and wrap my legs around Alex's waist. It's a little hard, since my back is facing his front. but that's how the move is supposed to go. I lean down, distributing my weight towards the floor. I know that if I don't do this right, I'll just end up face planting.

I use my free arm to touch the floor, and push myself between the space of Alex's legs. I bring my legs down. And just like that, Alex's is on the floor, with a bleeding nose. "Shi- I mean shoot. Sorry." I help Alex off the ground, and give him some tissue.

"Good job remembering what I taught you, Prudence."

I feel myself smile. But it fades when My dad starts yelling at Alex. "You let your younger sister, beat your ass?! It looks like only one of you has been taking my teaching, to mind." My dad turns his attention back to me. "You're free to go."

I open my mouth to say something, but retreat when my dad raises an eyebrow. I nod my head and walk out. I feel a tear slip down my cheek as I know what's about to happen to him.

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