Him & I¹||Aidan Gallagher

8|Black Out Days

"A thousand voices howling in my head..."

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Y/n's Pov:

While I held my arm's around Aidan's back his breathing seemed to calm down, every once in a while he would whisper "I'm sorry", but I didn't know why he was apologizing. "Hey.. Look at me" I moved away a little bit and made him look at me.

"Y/n I don't know anymore, I don't- I don't know what to do!" He jerked himself back from me turning from side to side still in front of me.

At a glance I saw one of the boys coming over, Mason I think he had said his name was. I saw him stop and he slightly waved his hand towards him while looking at me, I looked at him and then at Aidan.

"Aidan, go upstairs and wait for me, I'll be up in a second. Please try to calm down.." he nodded and walked upstairs. Once I knew he was up there I went over to Mason, "What?" I asked.

"You don't know everything about him, do you?" He said quietly, "What are you talking? What do you mean everything?" He grabbed my shoulder trying to take me somewhere, but I pushed him away.

"Don't fucking touch me again-" I said loud enough for only us to hear, he put his hands up looking at me. "No wonder you're always alone, cause you're a total bitch." He smirked while walking away, I ignored it and went upstairs to Aidan's room and knocked.

There was no response so I opened the door a little only enough to peek my head in, I saw him laying on his bed, on his side facing away from me.

I came in and closed the door and looked up at him, still in the same position he was 3 seconds ago. I walked towards his bed, I worried about what he was going through.

I sat on the bed next to him, running my fingers through his hair, I tried to think of something to say. Something that hopefully wouldn't set him off.

"You don't have to keep whatever you're feeling in.. You can talk to me Aidan" I continued playing with his hair, he slowly grabbed my hand that was on his head and held it near his face.

Not a word came from him, it was as if the happy boy I was with not long ago, never existed.

"I don't want to hurt you.." he said quietly with his my hand almost pressed against his mouth.

"What do you mean hurt me?" I asked looking at him. He nodded his head, "I'm the reason she's dead Y/n."

I felt bad for not knowing who he was talking about, I pulled my hand away and he looked at me opening his mouth ready to say something.

"Remember.. 2 years ago that freak accident?" He asked, I did, it was everywhere for almost, well til now. "Yeah.." I responded, he chuckled sarcastically and looked at the ceiling.

"It wasn't a freak accident as they called it, and the girl. I knew, her name was Sarah, Sarah Collins, she.." he paused for a moment either trying to remember what happened, or forget.

"She just moved here, considered the new girl as everyone but me referred to her as. The night that happened, before we were at a party. A party I never should have gone to because if I hadn't she'd still be alive and I wouldn't be living in this goddamn shithole Madison calls a home! All because Josh wanted me to stop being a bitch and get high! Like every fucking else was, so you know what I did?! I did what he said!"

He sat up, "Aidan-" I tried to stop him.

"What!? What could possibly be wrong Y/n!? You want to know what the fuck is wrong with me so there! Oh! And not to mention the fact I was beat the shit out of by kids from school and that piece of shit I had to call an uncle!" He broke down in tears and held his head down.

I grabbed him and brought his head to my chest holding him, "Aidan.. I'm so sorry, but I promise you. You won't hurt me, we all have made mistakes.." I felt his head lift up and his hands wiping his cheeks.

"Life isn't fair.. That's what it is-" he whispered, "I know it isn't, I wish it'd get better but.. life can't always go the way we want it do we?" I looked at him, he looked at me shaking his head again.

"If only it did.. Neither of us would be here-" after he said that I looked down at the floor. If life had gone the way we wanted it to then, we never would have met.

"Can you do me a favor?" I asked.

"Anything.."

"Could you drive me-" he cut me off.

"No.. I'm not driving.."

"Please? Aidan nothing is going to happen, plus it isn't far and I think you'd like the spot.." I smiled a little.

He sighed, "Only this one time. Deal?" I laughed, "Ok Gallagher.." I got up and kissed him before grabbing my jacket and walked out of the room.