My Letters to Lourdes

My Landlords and The End.

April 16, 2021

Dear Grandma,

I'm starting to get irritated with my landlords. They keep turning on the news so loud every morning. Who wants to hear about someone's death so early in the morning? I mean, if it's your time, it's your time. The same thing goes with you, grandma, as well as mom, who died in the bathroom, right? How can the nature of life be a piece of news? Also, I guess poisoning people is still a thing.

Also, I stopped talking to the policeman I had a date with. Patrick, was it? I cannot even look at men. They disgust me.

April 23, 2021

Dear Grandma,

I'm writing right now at 8:23 AM on a Saturday because my landlord's television is so freaking loud. It's the same freaking news about some guy's death. Death in his bed? Wasn't that the best way to go? Ugh, I just want to sleep! I've been so tired since last night!

April 24, 2021

Dear Grandma,

Today's just another normal day. I haven't been on a dating app nor talked to any guys. As usual, my landlords were watching the news in the morning and said to me, "Hey Yumi, be careful out there. There's just been a killing five minutes away from here." I smiled and said my thanks for their concern. Why would someone kill me? A woman who never tricked or took advantage of other people? I never gave any of them a reason to be bad to me. Ridiculous.

"Your honor, these letters addressed to the late Lourdes Song and found beside her urn are enough proof that Yumi Song has every intention to harm the victims. The dates of her entries go exactly well with the dates of the victims' deaths. That is all I could say in our part." The male lawyer said. After reading Yumi's letters to her deceased grandmother for the first time, I knew that she was the one who wrecked Liam and Marcelo's cars and ended Ly and Rada's lives. It was an easy case to solve. Yumi was quiet during the whole trial, even though the courtroom was full of cheers and cries from the victims' families. She never shed a tear even after the judge's verdict for her to be imprisoned.

"Patrick, thank you for helping us bring justice to the victims' families." The lawyer said to me and tapped me on my shoulder. It was the right thing to do. Somehow, there's a small part of me that felt justice was one-sided.

It's been five months since the first time I met Yumi in the coffee shop. I was starstruck when I first met her. I still remember the way she looked as she was writing in her notebook. She was wearing a blue crop top sweater and a denim miniskirt to show off her long and thick legs. She looked so calm and smart. She was very pretty and had the perfect curves. Her pale smooth skin, her red lips, her long black hair that falls straightly to her lower back, and her sparkling eyes behind her glasses were just a bonus to her funny, bright, and thoughtful personality. Anyone who could see Yumi Song that day would never think she had it in her to kill. I never knew that time how broken she was. She never talked to me after that day, although I wanted to see her again.

I am sitting right now in the visitation area of the prison. Any time now, Yumi's going to come out from that door. I don't know why I'm nervous. It's not even a date, especially when there is a glass between us.

The door suddenly screeched and opened; then I saw her beautiful face like the first day I met her but with lighter weight and lesser sleep. I don't know why I stood when I saw her, but I sat down again. She doesn't look happy to see me. I grabbed the phone and asked, "Hey, how are you?" She stared at me for a time; no, she glared at me as if I spewed some kind of insult. It took her a minute before she grabbed the phone on her side. She said, "Are there not enough girls to toy around outside the prison that you come here and bother me?"

"Yumi, I just want to know how you are," I defended. She got more annoyed and said in an even angrier tone, "Stop with the bullshit Patrick, you're here so you could bring more information about how I'm suffering to whoever family you're working for. Tell me, is it Ly's family?"

"I'm not working for any family. I care about you." That sounded wrong. How could I care about her when I was the one who suspected and investigated her in the first place?

She rested her back to the chair, calmed herself, and said coldly, "No one's capable of caring about me. That has been proven many times."

"Yumi, you just met a bunch of jerks at the wrong time. I'm not defending or justifying them, but-"I stopped. This was not what I came for. She looked like she was about to cry as she stared at me. I could see her jaws tensing up. Her eyes looked empty, and she stared at nothing. She probably cried it all out that there was nothing left to cry anymore. "Look, I just.. I just want to know how you are doing."

"If you're asking if I repented, the answer is no. I never regretted anything. Don't be shy. You're not the first person to ever visit and ask me." She replied.

"I find that very hard to believe," I answered her.

"Well, it doesn't matter. You don't know me. You only know the parts I want you to know. My ex said I was very manipulative." She smirked. Was she always like this? Even before she met those guys? She wasn't like this when I met her. I knew deep inside this was not her. Women are kind and loving, like how my mother was.

"Your ex said that because he was very immature and codependent." I met the guy during the investigation. His place reeked of weed and body odor. Yumi never replied and became quiet, so I broke the ice, "Why are you so quiet? What're you thinking?" She smiled, even though she looked exhausted and sad, and she said, "You're just as lost and lonely as me, aren't you? That's why you're here." She sounded like she found the perfect evidence for a crime scene. I was dumbfounded and speechless until she spoke again, "So, you got promoted." She pointed out to my badge on the uniform I was wearing.

"Yeah, that means I could visit you more often." I smiled. Suddenly, the curiosity in her face vanished.

"Okay, I'm sorry, but visitation time is up," the lady officer said. Yumi was staring at me as if she was trying to find answers in my eyes. As she was standing up, she said, "You want to be friendly? Then take my friendly advice. Stay the hell away from me and my letters." Was she writing more letters? I was stunned by the closeness of her face, but I regained my composure quickly. So, I said, "It was nice seeing you, Yumi."

"The feeling's not mutual," she replied. She willingly walked away and went back inside her cell. Stay away from her letters, she said. She knew I was the one who found and reported it. I don't know why I felt guilty. Yes, I did my job as a police officer. I helped with the cases of the male victims. But who'd bring justice to Yumi Song? Didn't they kill her first?