Thundering Thoughts

She is the Ruins: Posterior to the Ruination and the Ruined

It's not that I don't want to be
   blissful—I want to.
I don't despise strings—I want it as
   much as you all do.
But I don't trust myself—not when I
   know a person could break
   individuals similar to how they
   could break glass.
Definitely not when I'm well aware
   of how someone who'd broken
   others could also be broken
   beyond redemption's grasp.

Dread fills me; shame oozed more
   as I envisioned the looming scorn
   against my actions.
I had become the ruination yet I am
   ruined beyond salvation.
Hence, eschew the ruins and spare
   it no glance.
For a corroded metal cannot be
   revivified to a lance.