ʟɪғᴇ ɪs ɴᴏᴛ ᴀ ғᴀɪʀʏᴛᴀʟᴇ | namjin ✔

•five•

"Lost you"
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--2 days before graduation--

These past three days had been literal shit for Namjoon. Seokjin was really getting on his nerves nowadays. He pissed him off to the point Namjoon wanted to rip his own hair out due to frustration.

He didn't know why Seokjin was acting like this. His eyes did not have the usual shine anymore. He looked dead. As if the Seokjin standing in front of Namjoon wasn't Seokjin at all.

His mental and physical state both looked concerning. Was he not getting enough sleep? Was he skipping meals? Namjoon was really concerned about him. But that still doesn't excuse the shit attitude he had been showing Namjoon.

Seokjin was acting like an annoying and obnoxious brat. And it was getting on Namjoon's nerves. No matter how much he loves him, it was as if Seokjin's whole intention was to make Namjoon hate him. If that was so, well it's working.

When the sole reason you fell in love with a person disappears, the love you had for them also disappears along the way. As a result, you fall out of love.

The only reason Namjoon hadn't fallen out of love with Seokjin was because he knew Seokjin was trying to make Namjoon hate him. It seemed like Seokjin hated himself. The part of him he has become now.

No one could tell the difference unless they stared right into his eyes or see through his fake smiles. To everyone else, Seokjin just seemed normal. But Namjoon knew better. The Seokjin he sees everyday was not the real Seokjin. He looked broken.

How much would it take to shatter him? Namjoon knew how it worked. He was once what Seokjin was now. To make him open up, Namjoon needed to shatter him first. Then pick up his pieces.

This couldn't go on. Seokjin's lifestyle was unhealthy. And Namjoon was afraid the blonde might develop depression or anxiety because of it. Namjoon has been there. It wasn't fun. He just wanted to kill himself at that point.

He won't let Seokjin go through the same thing.
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"What the fuck is wrong with you?!" -Namjoon.

Today was another day of Seokjin completely ignoring Namjoon or just getting on his nerves intentionally. The smaller would pick random fights with him for some reason. Namjoon didn't know why.

Seokjin looked sick, dehydrated, paler and weaker than before. Namjoon was concerned for him. But Seokjin was testing his patience. So he couldn't help but grab him by his shoulder and yell at him.

That was the last straw. Namjoon has had enough. He won't tolerate this behavior from Seokjin any longer.

"Have you looked at yourself Seokjin?! What the fuck is wrong with you?!" Seokjin was startled by the sudden reaction of Namjoon. So he froze, letting the taller say whatever he wanted.

He was too startled to even process that Namjoon had snapped. But that was the plan, wasn't it?

Yes, he was testing Namjoon's patience. Yes, everything he did was on purpose. Yes, he was trying to make Namjoon hate him. But along the way, his feelings were hurt too. Especially, now.

"All I see is fake. Plastic. Pretense. Is that what you are?" Every word pierced through Seokjin's heart like knives. He couldn't help what he was feeling. It wasn't his fault. Self-doubt was one of his biggest weaknesses.

"Everything was a lie, wasn't it?" Namjoon was humiliating him. Right in front of everyone. "Pretending to be Mr. Goody two shoes was fun. Right? And after you gained enough popularity, you decided to show everyone your true colors. Fake. You are fucking fake Kim Seokjin. Everything about you is fake. It was fun pretending to be something you are not. Wasn't it?" Even Namjoon didn't know what he was doing. He was too pissed and frustrated to control his wording.

Seokjin was really shocked by Namjoon's words. His eyes were rounded, looking at the taller with a disbelieving expression. He couldn't believe what Namjoon had accused him of. Even his mouth was ajar, while tears threatened to fall from his eyes. He was breathing heavily, as if he was about to get a panic attack.

That's when Namjoon realized what he did. "Jin, I-"
"You are right." Seokjin cut him off. But it scared Namjoon until he couldn't breathe anymore.

Seokjin was smiling as he answered that. His voice came out cracked, while tears were streaming down his face. "I'm fake. You are right." He repeated again, still breathing heavily. It seemed like he was in the middle of a panic attack. But he was trying his best to keep smiling as he said that.

"Seokjin-" Before Namjoon could do anything, the blonde ran away from the scene. Namjoon's worst fears had come to life. He never knew that Seokjin's case was this serious. Seokjin hadn't shattered. He had turned to dust...

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