ʟɪғᴇ ɪs ɴᴏᴛ ᴀ ғᴀɪʀʏᴛᴀʟᴇ | namjin ✔

•six•

"I still want you..."
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"What the fuck, Namjoon?!" Hoseok yelled at him. But he was crying. "Do you even know what you are saying?!" Namjoon turned to look at Hoseok, but he was still breathing heavily. He might just have a panic attack.

"Do you know why Seokjin is acting the way he is?!" No, Namjoon didn't. That's why the guilt was gnawing at him. Not letting go of him at all.

"He's dying! He's fucking dying!" Namjoon quickly turned to look at Hoseok. What does he mean? What does he mean by Seokjin is dying??

"He has fatal lung cancer! He's dying!" And Namjoon was sure he stopped breathing after that. He was breathing heavily. No, he couldn't breathe. It was as if the air was ripped off from his lungs.

It can't be true... No! It wasn't true. His Seokjin was okay. Nothing happened to him. Hoseok was lying. My Seokjin is okay. He's okay. Hoseok was just trying to scare him. This wasn't funny!

"Namjoon? Namjoon?!" Hoseok held the taller as he was about to fall to the ground due to loss of balance. "Calm down, Joon! Focus on my breathing!" The younger was having a panic attack.

"What the fuck are you guys looking at?! Help him!" Hoseok screamed at the people in the hallway, who were just watching everything happen, but did nothing to prevent it.

"Joon, keep breathing!" Hoseok reminded him as he ushered him towards the nurse's office with the help of a few other students.
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"How are you feeling?" Hoseok asked Namjoon as he woke up. He doesn't blame the younger for whatever happened in the hallway. It wasn't his fault. After a certain point, everyone snaps. That's what happened with Namjoon.

Besides, the taller didn't even know about Seokjin's condition. "Where is Jin?" Was the only thing Namjoon was asking since he woke up. He looked like he could cry. He looked so fragile at the moment that even Hoseok didn't know whom to feel his heart shattering for more. Seokjin, or Namjoon?

Hoseok sighed. "He went home. Don't worry about him. He's safe, I promise." Hoseok added because he was sure Namjoon wouldn't be convinced otherwise. "Seokjin told me to never tell you, but I feel like you have the rights to know. His plan was already flop anyway." Hoseok smiled a bit. But it was a sad smile.

Namjoon didn't say anything, waiting for Hoseok to continue. The elder sighed. "The reason Seokjin has been behaving like this since the last five months was because, he wanted you to hate him, and maybe forget about the truth himself for a while."

"Hate him?"

"Yes. Seokjin is not an idiot. He was aware that you were falling for him." Namjoon was silent. "At first, it was okay. According to Seokjin, that is. Because he was the only one who had feelings for you." Namjoon looked up at Hoseok in shock.

The elder smiled. "Yes, Seokjin has been in love with you for as long as you have. Maybe even earlier than you. But when he realized that your crush was turning into something strong and deep, Seokjin was afraid." Namjoon didn't understand, what was he afraid of?

"He was afraid it would hurt you when he- reached the last stage of his cancer." Hoseok chuckled. "Such a great best friend I have. He's more worried about your feelings than mine. Yes, he's not my boyfriend. That'd be incest." Hoseok made a cringing face, making Namjoon smile a bit, but still guilty about Seokjin.

"Today, Seokjin was sure he achieved something he had been trying to. Make you hate him." Then I'm sorry Seokjin, you failed. "We tried everything we could. But the chemotherapy was too expensive. Seokjin and I couldn't afford it. It was too late anyway. We can't save him." Every word was piercing through Namjoon's heart like knives.