Part 8: More to Us Than Meets The Eye

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Zoey narrates.

This morning, I'm sitting with Zara in my room, as she vents out her frustration over last nights dinner with Nathaniel and Aaron's heated conversation.

'Like, why can't he just treat me like an adult? And also, you guys literally dated during college, when you were the same age as me? So why is it any different?' She says, sighing.

'Listen honey, I get it. Trust me, I do, and I understand your frustration because even I had to go through this with your grandad Dre when Aaron and I were dating.' I say, as she raises her eyebrows surprised.

'Really?' She asks.

'Yes! And also, whatever your dad is doing is only out of love for you. He's protective over you because your his only daughter and he is always going to think that no one is good enough for you.' I say.

'Okay, I get that. But grandad easily accepted Aaron. So why can't dad accept Nathaniel?' She asks.

'Yeah, that's because I've known your father for 25 years! And trust me, he did not easily accept Aaron.' I say, laughing.

'What do you mean? You've never spoken about that before.' She asks, cautiously.

I take a deep breath.

'Okay, listen, what I'm about to tell you is something I haven't spoken about before, and I've not told you or your brother yet because I always felt like I didn't want you to make the same mistakes I did. But you're growing up, so you should know that there's more to us than meets the eye.' I say.

'Okay, you're scaring me.' She says, her eyes widening.

'When I was in...I can't remember either sophomore or junior year, I...we, as in Aaron and I...found out that I was pregnant.' I say, as Zara gasps.

'Oh my god, there's another child?!' Zara says, shocked.

'No!' I say, instantly.

'I was pregnant. Almost full term. And then...' I take a deep breath, because this is a hard conversation for me, even after all these years.

'I had a miscarriage.' I say.

'Oh, mom!' Zara says, leaning in closer to me, as I realise a tear had escaped my eye.

'But anyways, what I want you to understand is that your father and I were not exactly together-together at that time, although we were still very much in love and excited for the baby. But because of these circumstances, the fact that I was so young and Aaron wasn't my boyfriend, let alone husband, at the time, my dad was not in full support of Aaron. He didn't like him and it took a long time for him to trust Aaron and for Aaron to even earn his love.' I say.

'I can't believe this, mom. This must have been so hard.' Zara says, her eyes watering.

'It was hard...but it brought your dad and I closer together, and for that I will always be grateful.' I say, smiling bravely.

'I suppose I can see that it's not just my dad who is so protective.' She says.

Suddenly, I see someone leave from behind the door, and realise it must have been Aaron.

'Okay, but listen carefully Zara. Getting pregnant that young was not the plan, but I do not consider it a mistake. However, I don't want it to happen to you. It was really difficult. Studying, worrying about the future...and no matter what your dad and I will always be there for you, but just promise me that you'll be careful.' I say, sternly.

'Yeah, of course, mom.' She says.

'Have you and Nathaniel...you know, yet?' I say, as she looks away.

'No, but...I think I'm ready? Like, when it happens, it happens?' She replies.

'Oh, sweetie. Just you know, use protection....and you know we've always been pretty open together, so if you ever need to talk to me, I'm right here.' I say, as she hugs me.

'I love you, mom.' She says.

'I love you too, Zara.' I reply, smiling.

_____

Later that night, I climb into bed, in the dark, as I was working on my laptop late downstairs.

I try to be quiet, since Aaron is already in bed.

'Zoey.' He says, as I jump with surprise.

'You're still awake?' I ask, turning my body to face him, as we lie beside each other, and he looks at me, intently. He wraps his arm around me and pulls me closer.

'Is everything okay?' I ask, confused.

'Can I not just bring you closer to me?' He asks, laughing, so I stroke his face.

'I heard you talking to Zara.' He says.

'And reliving all of those memories. That must have been hard?' He adds.

I pause for a little while.

'It was. But it's the truth, and she needs to know.' I reply, softly.

'I know it was a very long time ago. But I'm sorry you had to go through all of that.' He says, kissing my hand.

'It was hard for you too.' I say.

'Seeing me like that.' I add.

'But look, It's made me who I am today. I'm stronger because of it. And i'm even more strong because I have you by my side. You never left me.' I say, smiling.

'At the time we were so excited to have a family.' Aaron says.

'And now we have just that. Our beautiful family.' I reply, as I smile and he kisses me softly.

I bury my head in his chest, as he wraps his arms tighter around me, and we stay like that for the rest of the night.

_____

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