"your alive" SabiGiyuu

Chapter 1 // promise me

3rd person Giyuu's Pov:

'Maybe I should just do it. Get it over with so I can finally be done.'

Those were the kind of intrusive thoughts Tomioka got during his depressive waves. And it had been that way ever since his sister had died. Plus all the other deaths the water Hashira had witnessed over the years didn't help much either.

'I won't do it yet, so maybe i'l just. . .'

He thought as he glanced down at his arm, and then his sword.

'Yes, il do that. But I need to get out of here first.'

Those thoughts blatantly continued as Giyuu looked around at his fellow Hashira. He watched them closely, looking for a moment where they were all distracted. That moment came a few minutes later when Obani's snake slip off his shoulder and made a wiled lung for Sanemi. Who shrieked loudly as he tried to hop out the way of the white reptile.

As the Hashiras burst out laughing Giyuu quietly slipped towards the door. But unfortunately, his luck had decided to tuck tail and run because the second he reached the door he heard an annoying but familiar phrase.

"Ara Ara, Tomioka. Do you really hate us that much? Or do you just think you're too good to hang out with the rest of us?"

The purple-haired Hashira said in an accusing tone. That definitely got the attention of the rest of the Hashira. But Giyuu just tried to ignore it. This kind of stuff happened so often you'd think he'd be used to it now. So did he. But those words cut deeper than his sword ever did.

'Far from it'

He thought as he looked back one more time at Shinobu and the others.

Instead of responding, he took a deep slow breath, then proceeded to turn and walk away.Shinobu didn't even try to hide her hatred toward Tomioka. And she quite enjoyed expressing it through her words. Such as this time.

The water Hashira didn't go back to his residence immediately, instead, he looked up at the Crescent moon and tried to hold back the tears that were threatening to spill.

Just as Tomioka was about to step off the hut porch he heard the insect Hashira throw one last brutal comment, as if she knew Tomioka could still hear.

"Geez, he acts like such an arrogant asshole. This is why nobody likes him or wants to get close."

That hurt. Because Tomioka knew it was true. Nobody liked him, and he hasn't been able to make a single friend since, well. Sabito. And we all know how that turned out.

'Why?'

That was Tomioka's breaking point. Just as his tears started to spill he made a wild dash towards his house. He awaited the relish of the darkness.

He both feared and loved the pain that came with it. The pain of the cuts reminded him that he was a worthless nothing who should have died a long time ago.

The second the raven-haired Hashira entered his house and shut the doors behind him, he unsheathed his sword and headed for his room.

He quietly sat down on his futon and tried to take a deep breath. But he knew it was just going to be useless as his tears continued to fall.

He rolled up his sleeves, running his hands across dozens of scars. Some old and some new. All he wanted to know was why the universe was so cruel.

Tomioka sobbed quietly as he lifted his blade to his arm and began to add pressure. The sting of the cut was reassuring in away. It reminded him that it was all real and not just some tortured dream.