The Queen of Hell

Chapter 22

*

Nathan walked in and gave me a quick hug before dropping his bag near mine, saying "Hey". I smiled, only a quick flash but my brain was going to happy places. I associated him with a safe place; only good memories went through my brain when I was with him.

I handed Nathan a knife and we walked over to the empty sparring circle, getting into our starting stances.

I lunged at him first and as he blocked the first blow he left his stomach unguarded and I swung my fist upwards, connecting it there. He made an 'oomph' sound and took a deep breath but then it was like I barely touched him. I scrunched my nose in frustration. He punched, aiming for my face so I dodged it, but he hit my ear. It didn't matter that he missed his target because it still threw me off balance. I stumbled back, trying not to fall and he pursued me. Right as I regained my balance, Nathan kicked and swept my legs out from under me. The wind was knocked out of me when I hit the floor, but as he bent over to punch me, I rolled and got away from him. I jumped back to my feet right as he turned around.

This time I went for his legs, knowing they were a weakness of his. I feigned a punch at his face and kicked at his right leg before sweeping them both out from under him. I pinned him down and pushed my arm against his throat, constricting his airflow.

He tapped out and I poked my tongue out at him. He laughed at my immaturity and then silence descended on us. After a few seconds, I quickly stood up, realising that I had been laying on top of him.

I had to grab a drink of water to hide my face which was surely blushing.

Once I was sure my face was relatively back to normal I turned and, shaking my arms out, said "let's go again"

We got back into our starting stances and as I threw a punch at him he got completely distracted and didn't even block which meant I hit him straight in the nose. His eyes immediately started watering and blood started dripping from his nose. He was blinking super fast as I started worrying "OMG Nathan. I'm so sorry. Are you ok? What ar-"

"There are a few juniors outside trying to watch" He interrupted, tipping his head up and trying to stop the blood flow.

I turned and sure enough, outside the window was Aiden, Owen and George. I stalked towards the door and when they saw me coming they started to scramble away. I yanked the door open with enough force to almost rip it off its hinges and unsheathed a few daggers, hauling them at the three fleeing boys.

Two of them caught Owen and George's suits and the other nicked Aiden's ear. All of them stopped running.

"Come here" Reluctantly all of them came back to the door. I held my hand out and they gave my daggers back. "You can have a turn if it's so fascinating" I said, referring to Nathan who was still in the sparring circle. He had stopped the blood from flowing out of his nose but there was dry blood still on his face.

I smirked when the boys saw him and physically paled. It was very obvious that they'd never fought or probably even talked to an older assassin. I moved Aiden so he was opposite Nathan in the circle.

"Don't kill him, just roughen him up a little. Teach him a lesson" I whispered when I walked past Nathan. He nodded with a small mischievous grin before turning his attention to Aiden.

I stood on the side with the other nervous boys and called start. Aiden rushed at Nathan and tried to throw a punch.

Keyword: tried.

Nathan caught his arm mid swing and threw him backwards, throwing him completely off balance. As Aiden stumbled, trying to gain balance again, Nathan gave me a disbelieving look. Nathan swung at Aiden and he blocked but judging by his grimace the block hurt almost as much as the blow would've.

A few minutes later I stopped them. I actually felt sick. Aiden was hopeless against Nathan. I even let the other 2 join in and Nathan barely struggled to hold all 3 back.

"Just go. All 3 of you" I sighed, disappointed. Once they left I went over to our stuff and sat, head in my hands. "They're so hopeless. I can't help them" I felt like I was being held together by tightly stretched strings, each responsibility, each pressure put on me is like a bird sitting on a wire and straining them. "I can't do it. I can't-"

Nathan grabbed my shoulders and made me look at him and breathe with him, stopping my impending panic attack. I fell into him, feeling no better about myself.

***

Once I collected myself, we grabbed all our things and headed back to the main training room to use the punching bags. I put the weapons away and we went over to the punching bags. I beat it, letting out the rest of my frustration with the juniors, trying to punch away the doubt plaguing my mind. It was a nice sort-of therapy and my annoyance made my strength levels rise a bit.

As I finished, Ashton walked in and I rolled my eyes, sighing. He saw us and sneered as he made his way over. I might've been barely conscious when I was rescued but I was pretty sure Ashton was one of the people who were there to save me. I guess he'd reverted back to his old ways now that I was safe.

"Raina. I must say, I didn't get a thank you for helping save you" He smirked "How about you give me a mission performance and..... thank me?" I wanted to slit his throat, he was lucky we were surrounded by assassins.

"Just because you did one good thing in your god awful life-"

"Uh uh. I don't think that's a very good thank you"

I was almost shaking, not sure whether it was with anger, exhaustion or defeat. "Get lost Ashton. You're like the living, human version of a headache and I'm not dealing with you today"

"I see getting kidnapped and tortured hasn't affected your humour" He scoffed. It hit me like a punch to the gut. I reeled over, blinking back tears. The voices in my head got too loud as if talking through microphones. Ashton noticed and laughed, getting up close to my face "You're so weak and pathetic. Look at you"

I vaguely registered that Nathan yanked Ashton away and they started arguing but my head was spinning. I turned and rushed out, trying desperately not to let the floor roll from under my feet.

Somehow, I made my way to my room and collapsed after closing the door. His words cut through my defences, leaving me vulnerable, with the thoughts that had been plaguing my mind since I'd been rescued.

He knew damn well that I was still recovering from Frank, and bringing up my performances was a low blow. It was all too much for me, especially after the meltdown I'd already had.

I felt like a failure. I had prepared almost my entire life to do the job of an assassin and I had broken at the tortured screams that sounded like people I loved.

I felt powerless as tears ran down my cheeks, my body not listening to my brain's commands to stop being so weak.

That's when I realised that Ashton was right. Frank was right. They were all right.

I was pathetic and broken, no matter how much I tried to prove otherwise. 

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A/N
I'm sorry for the hurt at the end <3

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