Her Stutters And Mumbles // P.J.M (#23)

69

Taehyung

I felt like something went off in me and I am not being myself at all, I can't be myself if something huge happened and I can't be pretending that nothing went wrong and I can just go on without coming to confront the issue. I would want to pretend that I didn't know what happened so that I can continue to maintain a friendship with Jimin but I really can't do that, as long as his face comes to my mind, I have the urge to go up to him and proceed to yell at him, using all of my strength to resent him.

The fact that he has such a relationship with Kim Seokjin and I had to find out about it the ugly way, I wished that I was asleep in my bed that night and I would never leave my room no matter what happens and I would only come out of my room in the morning. Why was I even up at that time?

Right, I was so high that I needed to get back to my bed and I happened to see Park Jimin getting into Kim Seokjin's room, hand in hand and they were touchy with each other.

I have known for the longest time that Park Jimin and Kim Seokjin were close for a very long time, he didn't exactly tell me the reason but he said that Kim Seokjin was his saviour and he owed it to him, I know that he didn't come from a wealthy family and Kim Seokjin was the one who helped him get to where he is today. I have only got to know Jimin at the end of high school where he transferred in year 3 and he is already close to Kim Seokjin, I have gotten close to him as well and I thought of him as my soulmate as we had so many things in common and we have decided to share the same dream.

We got into the same university and I thought that we could have the same career together and hopefully, we will stay like this for the rest of our life but it seems like I was the only one who was thinking about that, Park Jimin only thought of me as a friend from the start to the end and the closest that I can be to him is just a close friend and I am no different from the others.

I gulped down an entire glass of hard liquor and I looked towards the bartender who hesitated to give me another glass of the same content, he knows that I have been drinking a lot for such a short amount of time and I am going to get alcohol poisoning if I continue to do so but I hope that I can get alcohol poisoning so that I will be in the hospital and everyone will come to visit me, Park Jimin will come to show his concern for me as well.

No, he won't... His mind is filled with Kim Seokjin and I don't come in first, I was never the first person on his list and I will never be. I got up from my seat and made my way to another bar since the bartender here is so unwilling to let me die from the alcohol, I know that he is helping me live but I don't need that.

I walked inside the bar and I immediately went to an empty seat and I sat down, it feels good to be in a new bar and I have no idea what bar I am in, all I know is that I am going to be here for some time and the atmosphere around here is great as well. I looked around for the signboard and it read the name of the nightclub, that nightclub sounded so familiar for some reason and I have no idea why.

I hear someone clearing their throat and I looked up, surprised to find HoSeok hyung staring back at me. He is wearing their uniform so he is working here, no wonder the name seemed so familiar to me, he told me to find him at his workplace if I needed to talk to him today.

I feel a sudden surge of emotions and I am ready to cry. "It is not good to cry in a bar, Kim Taehyung!" He yelled at me and I immediately nodded his head, he sure is very stern at times. "You are ready to tell me whatever it is bothering you and you are willing to tell me even though I might tell someone else about it."

"Why would I be afraid of it? You knew as well." I said what I said, I am not afraid of letting anyone know anymore. "I was there when they got into the same room and then I heard them, I thought that I was hearing wrongly but I can't deny it."

"You and Park Jimin, do you like him?" He asked me, he knows what happened that night and he knows how I feel towards Park Jimin as well. But for how long did he find out about that?

"Can you get me the strongest drink that you have? I think that I would need a lot of courage to tell you." I said to him and he stared at me for a few more seconds before walking away and coming back to me with a drink on his tray.

"I think that it is enough for you to tell the most embarrassing secrets and you will not remember anything at all, the bartenders are all afraid of making this drink and I hope that you don't die from it." He warned me.

"I don't mind losing my life over this small glass of liquor, HoSeok hyung. I don't even think that I should be alive in the first place." I downed the entire glass in one shot and my head hit the table almost immediately and I know that I am dead.

But then I find myself opening my eyes and I see a white ceiling above me and I am laying down in someone's bed, having no idea how I even got here in the first place. Did I get kidnapped?