Life With A New Addition

Ch. 6

Lauren's POV

When I get to the hotel, I make my way inside. I get my room that I have alone in case I need privacy or something, or simply a place to call Jay to see Rosemary. I head upstairs and go up to my floor. I make my way to my room when Louis happens to come out of the room next door. "Can we talk," he asks softly. I nod and he follows me inside. He shuts the door and I put my stuff on the bed before I throw myself in his arms. He holds me tightly. "I'm so sorry," he cries.

"I miss you so much," I cry into his neck. "Why did you have to do that? Why did you have to do it and break my heart to the point I have to stay away from you," I ask him hurting.

"Because I was stupid," he cries.

"Was it worth it?"

"NO! Absolutely not! I'd do anything to take back what happened! I would have stayed right where I was on the couch with your head in my lap! You don't know how hard it's been for me the past sixteen days! If you didn't tell me multiple times that if I hurt myself you'll never speak to me again, I wouldn't be here right now. I've had to call mum almost every night so she can talk me out of killing myself. I hate myself baby," he sobs making my heart break with his.

"Nobody wants a world without you in it, me especially. But most importantly your daughter that you seem to forget is important," I say.

"No I don't! I don't forget about her Lauren," he argues. "She's on my mind every second of every day! When I see that picture of the three of us, I am terrified because I don't know if I'll ever have her in my life because of the mistakes I made. The only reason I haven't said anything about her is because we are talking about us. That doesn't mean I don't love Rosemary or that she's not just as important to me as you are."

"I'm sorry Lou. It's just really hard on me too. I've been raising her basically by myself because I don't want anyone to bother us or act like I need to be babied. I certainly don't want to be questioned about how I'm feeling after my heart has been shattered. Niall is being as sweet and helpful as he can be, but he's driving me crazy Lou! He's constantly over to make sure I'm ok and he keeps pressuring me to go to the doctor to deal with my depression, but I don't want or need it! I know why I'm depressed and I have every fucking right to be! I'm just frustrated," I cry into him.

"I can see that beautiful," he kisses my cheek. "What can I do to help while you're letting me be around you?"

"Can you cuddle with me," I ask pathetically.

"It would be my pleasure," he grins and picks me up. I cling onto him and he climbs on the bed with me in his arms. We cuddle together and I sigh in relief. I can't even explain how much I've missed him. "Is there any chance you'll stay with me?"

"I am staying with you Louis. We promised to stay together for Rosemary if not for us. I'm still figuring out if I'm going to immediately stay with you, or if I'm going to stay in another room."

"Please stay with me," he begs me. "I don't deserve it, but please?"

"I will think about it. Don't ask me for sex when I'm cleared though because you're not getting it," I tell him.

"I wouldn't dare ask babe," he says seriously. "If you ever want to have sex with me again, I promise on my life and Rosemary's that I'll never touch any other woman like I do you. I promise that now too," he says looking into my eyes.

"What is your plan for the party," I ask him.

"We are going to a strip club, but I told them I'm not getting danced on or any of that. We are clubbing, but I'm only drinking a little bit so they see me being involved. I'm not sure what else, but whatever it is, I'm not doing anything you wouldn't approve of. I'm trying my absolute hardest to do what I can to win you back. Whatever you ask me to do, I'll do it!"