ᴅɪꜱᴛᴀɴᴛ ꜱᴛᴀʀꜱ (ʏᴏᴏʜᴀɴᴋɪᴍ)

Chapter 4:

(Tw) Very, very brief implication of self-harm. 

--

Kim Dokja woke up when the room door was knocked upon.

It was a nice sleep.

He glanced on the bed for Lee Jihye but didn't find her. Kim Dokja sighed and sat up.

—Knock, knock.

How could he describe the situation in simple words?

He didn't know.

Kim Dokja scratched at the scabbing cuts on the side of his stomach. He swallowed earnestly.

The current state was confusing. For a split second he thought he had woken from a dream, but then was returned to his senses after remembering that the bed wasn't his.

—Knock, knock.

He searched his hands through the blanket for his phone and sighed in relief when he found it just on the cabinet. Kim Dokja gnawed on his lower lip and got off the bed, and walked over to the door.

Before opening the door, he hesitated. Then opened it.

A tall man, muscular and strong looking—but with a kind face, blinked in surprise as Kim Dokja opened the door.

"Hyung?" He asked... sensing familiarity from the latter.

He thought it over, mind racing back to Ways of Survival to grab information. 'Ah.' Indeed.

[ A tall, muscular man with a kind face... named Lee Hyunsung.]

His heart picked up pace again. 'Lee Jihye...Lee Hyunsung... then was the doctor?' He thought about the way she looked—white hair, delicate lashes and rosy lips.

'Lee Seolhwa.'

Kim Dokja took his head back from where he was peeking and quickly crouched down, burying his head in between his folded arms and knees. 'Stupid! Stupid!'

'Does that mean... Yoo Joonghyuk—that sunfish?' His face almost flushed. He could meet his protagonist.

Kim Dokja recollected himself with a thought, 'Yoo Joonghyuk wouldn't let this small fear put him down.' It was a childish thought, but one that supported him. He stood up and expected to find an empty hallway.

But was surprised when he saw Lee Hyunsuung still standing there with his hand scratching the back of his neck. "Hyunsung Hyung?" He managed to ask.

Lee Hyunsung looked back at him with his lips parted and eyebrows lifted. "Dokja-ssi! You're alright..." Kim Dokja found himself enveloped in a hug. 'Dokja-ssi?'

'Jihye called me an ahjussi...do I really exist? Am I still lucid dreaming?'

He stood as still as a stone. "Hyung—"

Kim Dokja wrapped his arms around Lee Hyunsung's shoulder as a thought dropped itself on him. 'Would I really manage to live with these people when I grow up... would I no longer be lonely? But...if this is a lucid dream... it'll end...won't it?'

He was endowed with the feeling that his future self was lucky. And jealousy presented itself in the worst form.

Being jealous of yourself.

–

Lee Hyunsung might've carried Kim Dokja once or twice. But that would be it. It was funny, really. Lee Hyunsung sometimes laughed when he thought about it—in solemnity. The two of them met in a subway, Kim Dokja helped him, and their relationship kicked off.