Until Then. // denis shapovalov - sascha zverev

4.1 - used to

Willow's POV

Fuck, fuck, fuck! I think to myself, trying to call Dom back. I had totally forgotten about his and my plans today. After he finished his match, we were supposed to hangout and celebrate and I wanted to go check on Alex for a quick second beforehand, but one thing led to another and I ended up spending the rest of the evening with Alex, totally forgetting to text Dom to cancel.

My phone had forty missed text messages between Dom and Denis and I groan in stress. I just got back from one of the best nights I've had and dealing with my mad best friend and worried boyfriend was the last thing I wanted to do... Is Denis my boyfriend? "Boyfriend"? Well yes, he's my boyfriend, he asked me out and I said yes. I'm just... confused at the moment, I guess. We just started actually dating just about a week ago and now we're already doing long distance. Did I rush into things?

I check the time, seeing it's two in the morning. I see that Denis stopped texting me a couple hours ago, but Dom might still be awake. I decide to call him.

"Willow?" I hear Dom groggily say into the phone.

"Domi, hi, did I wake you?" I ask.

"No, no, you're all good. It's everything okay with you? You didn't respond to me, I thought you were called to work, or you got lost or something and you couldn't find your way back... Are you okay?" Dom asks.

As much as I wanted to lie and say there was a work issue, I didn't want to do that to Dom. I don't even think I've ever lied to him. I sigh, "You can be mad at me, I promise I deserve it. I went to go see Alex to see how he was doing after the game and I was trying to comfort him and I just lost track of time and totally forgot that we had plans and it's all my fault, I should have texted you, I just totally forgot and you can hate me but not for long because you're my best friend and I need you but also I take total responsibility." I spit out, nervously.

"Willow, Willow, calm down, it's okay, it's totally okay," Dom hushes me. "Just don't do it again, okay? Just text me next time so I'm not worried about you," he says.

"Wait... you're not mad?" I ask, confused, feeling even worse. "No, no, Dom, you need to be mad at me. I completely blew you off. You should be angry at me and I'm really, really sorry!"

Dom chuckles.

How could he chuckle? I'm about to shit myself over here and he's so calm.

"Willow, I'm just really happy that you're safe. You've never canceled on me before and I've done it to you a dozen times, it's okay. Just remember to text me next time, that's all," Dom answers.

"No, you've had a valid excuse, though! It's always because you have practice that you can't miss! That makes sense!! It's a true excuse! Mine was for a boy and that doesn't count. Remember? 'Bros before Hoes' except none of us are really being hoes here, but you get what I mean! We're best friends and I put someone else before you!" I plead, trying to convince him to at least feel an ounce of anger towards me for standing him up.

"Willow, I'm serious, don't worry about it!" Dom reassures me. "I was upset for a second but I'm more relieved that you're okay. Willow, of course we're best friends, but I also know that there will come a time when we have to sacrifice a little part of our relationship to build new ones with other people and at first, I never could have ever imagined that, but after the past month, seeing flourish with new experiences, I now trust you to pick the right people to grow with and build relationships with."

For a second, I'm confused at the sudden change in tone. My apology was surface level to me, but he just opened up another layer that I didn't even consider. What did he mean by 'sacrificing a part of us?'

"Do you mean, like... sacrificing how close we are?" I ask.

Dom takes a long breath and I can feel hi readjust his position through the phone. "No, not really. We will always be close, that's a given, but it's more of like... I won't be the first person you tell things to, and I've recently learned that that's okay," Dom explains. "Or like... if you need to go grocery shopping or to the gym or on a hike, I wont be the person you always ask, and I've had to learn that that's alright."

I purse my lips. I didn't agree with him. "Maybe you won't be the first person I tell things to, but you're always one of the first people I think of wanting to tell anything to... like... like if I hear good news, I have a group of people who come to mind: my family, you, and-" I hesitate. I want to say Alex and Denis, but I choose to leave them out. "And, Ada." I say. "So maybe you won't be the first person I tell, but you'll always be on my mind to tell. I don't want to sacrifice any part of us. I want to make compromises. But today, I was wrong. I didn't remember, and that's completely my fault. I'll need to work on myself with it... But you'll always be on my list, I promise," I say.

Dom takes a couple seconds to respond. I stay silent on the other line.

"Wanna sleepover?" He asks.

-

Dom's POV

How do I tell Willow that I used to have a crush on her without telling her that I used to have a crush on her? I wonder to myself. Used to? Still? I'm unsure. Was it even a crush? I sometimes find myself thinking about her and me and our future together. Having a future together. It's like... we go off and date other people and make a couple of mistakes, but at the very end, we'd end up together. Even if we grew apart, we would magically find our way back to each other and realize that this was it all along.

I always wanted this, but after seeing how happy she was with Denis and caught up in her feelings for Alex, I realized that I needed to take a step back and treat her as a best friend, nothing more. And instead of dreaming about a future with her, just to let that vision go and see where things take us. And although there are moments where I'm hit with jealousy or anger, I remind myself that she's not mine and I need to let her decide what she wants for herself. Because as long as she's happy, I trust her judgement and so am I.

I wait patiently for Willow to get here. It was our last night together before she flies back to Germany and I stay here. With Laver Cup in two weeks, I was going to stay in America, in Florida, instead of going home for training.

The door rings and, I run up to grab it. In all fairness, I have worked on my crush on her. I am aware that I need to let her go, and eventually I will, slowly, but that doesn't stop the fact that my heart still races a little when I hear her little knock pattern on my door.

"Hey, you," She smiles as I let her into my room. "I'm so sorry, again."

"Stop saying you're sorry," I chuckle following her walk to my bed to sit down on.

"I'm sorry that I'm sorry," she says. "Take that."

"Much better," I smile, sitting down next to her. "How did things go with Alex? He okay?"

"Well first of all," she responds. "Congratulations! I am so happy for you!"

She hugs me. Her touch still tugs at my heart.

"Secondly, it went okay. He's definitely upset, which makes sense... But there seems to be something else on his mind. I'm just not sure what it is. He wouldn't say anything about it, and I didn't wanna push him..." She says. "Can we not talk about it? I kinda just wanna let today rest."

I nod, understanding what she gets. We were both exhausted. "Of course, Willow. Come here," I say, crawling under the sheets with her. We lay there in silence, our eyes closed, not even noticing each other drift off into sleep.