You are enough

Forgiveness

Nathalie's POV

I woke up after lunch time, grabbed my tablet and checked my boss' schedule. I was well aware he had asked me to call him when I woke, yet I could not bear the thought of interrupting something relevant. He was in a meeting with the mayor which was supposed to end in fifteen minutes, but, I know for a fact that either it was already over or it would soon be.

I crawled out of bed and managed to get hold of my crutches. Slowly, I entered the bathroom where I took a quick shower and got dressed with a clean robe as I would do every day.

I sat back again in my bed and looked at the mirror. I looked radiant. Gabriel's presence in my life made everything seem less painful. Ever since I decided to join this quest by his side, I knew it was going to be a lose-lose fight for me; a hopeless secretary in love with her boss who, by the way, happened to be madly in love and obsessed with his wife? There was no other way I fitted in there, but in helping him reach his goal.

I called Gabriel and he came with a cup of warm tea in one hand and the book we were reading together in the other hand.

"How are you feeling, Nathalie?" He asked as he caressed my wet hair and left the cup on my bedside table. Only then I realised I had not pinned my hair up in a bun and that it ran loose over my shoulders.

"I'm doing well, sir. Thank you," I said trying to hide the creeping blush of my cheeks.

"Me? No, Nathalie. I'm no one you should thank. I put you into this... I did this to you." He let himself fall on the bed.

I took his hand shyly.

"Sir, I chose this."

"Yes, Nathalie. You chose my selfishness and taught me selflessness. Nathalie I..."

"That is fine, sir. I would do it all again. All the way to the end... all the way until we bring your wife back."

"And I would never let you do it again. Not now that I know what happened... not now that I know I could have lost you for real. Even if we went back in time I would do things differently... there would have been no Mayura... I would have given up... but you would be safe and sound." He looked at me with pleading eyes. "Nathalie, I'm sorry... for everything. First, I failed Emilie... then you..."

I rubbed his back in an attempt to comfort him.

"You did not fail me, sir... or Emilie. We are not done, yet."

"Nathalie, look at you, will you? I did this to you... I knew what would happen and yet my greed and pride did not let me stop you... but if I had another chance I would. I would hide the miraculous away from you so that you never found it and wore it... so that you didn't do this to yourself."

"Sir, I chose this, I..." I coughed.

"Nathalie..." he ran his fingers through my hair.

"I'm fine, sir." I brushed his hand off, blushing.

"And Emilie... Nathalie, I'm not even sure if I want to go on with this. I have never succeeded... those two always seem to win no matter what I do... time is running out for her, for me... for us." He clasped my hand and sighed in a sort of relief. "Nathalie, my certainties are vanishing... I have everything I ever wanted in front of my eyes."

"But, sir. You cannot let her go. Remember why you are doing this!"

His eyes turned to a fixed point in the floor and they shone with the unmistakable light of cluelessness.

"I don't even know, Nathalie. Not anymore." He laid his head on my shoulder as I gently removed his glasses. "Would you ever forgive me if, after everything you went through, I gave up?"