RafexKiara Tangled Up in All Your Pieces // Riara

Chapter 18

"What do you think about this?" I suggest to Colton.

I emerged from a dressing room, posing while resting my hand on the dressing door.

Colton laughs at my silly pose because I was trying to divert his attention away from the clothing and onto my pose so he wouldn't criticize my fashion sense.

I was dressed in a vintage gown, which I didn't normally wear, but I liked the lacey silk on the front of the gown.

Even though prom was months away, I dragged Colton along with me to go prom dress shopping.

The last dance I attended was one I don't want to remember.

I wanted to have a typical high school dance experience, but Sylvia and her cronies ruined it for me.

Freshman year was defined by endless nights of crying, open wounds, and the evil nature of society, which I let pull me back and forth like a magnet.

Sophomore year was the year I'd like to define as an awakening to the deeper self, which had always tugged at my heart to open up and allow itself to evolve within me.

School was a drug that numbed the sense of one's true self as an individual.

My mind's sobriety eventually made its way to my brain, jolting me back to reality and revealing that the mask I was attempting to put on was a waste of time.

They say that little by little, you will realize how you are supposed to live.

It may take some time for some, and others may pick up on it right away, but you will eventually realize how you are supposed to live.

That was not caring what others thought of you.

Not allowing the voices to get inside your head, but instead embracing it in order to keep going and live a life that matters because you are the one who matters in the first place.

Kildare High School's prom and homecoming were not your typical high school dances.

Sarah compared it to a scene from Euphoria, when the teachers and administration stopped caring what the kids did, as long as it wasn't a crime.

But they saw themselves in us, which allowed them to keep a close eye on us, ensuring that nothing got out of hand while allowing us to live out the youth that we all had and would have.

Most people would go to the after-prom party. The lower classmen all went to the prom dance, unaware of the after party.

Some people with siblings would go to the afterparty, but the freshman had no idea what it was.

It would eventually be passed around, and everyone would be there.

You'd go to the regular prom in your typical prom dress, and then find a ride to the after party after changing into a more fitted dress at home.

The party had a feel of teenage nostalgia to it. You name it: your first drink, joint, hit, kiss, and so on. It'd be at the after-party.

The party grew in popularity, eventually attracting students from neighboring schools on the island.

My freshman year, I had my first joint. It was something I allowed myself to relax over in order to get away.

I credited that joint with bringing me to the dance floor; the weed within me breathed out in relief, moving me to the beat of the music, and putting me in a state that allowed me to finally realize who I was.

I made a public declaration. That I was going to start climbing the ladder in order to turn on the light, which would turn on the switch to a standing ground in my life on which I would stand my ground.