Our Little Love ➳ Camila Cabello

fifteen

I'm not sure how it happened. I'm not even sure how we got back to the trailer. Probably a taxi because we were both too far gone to drive.

As soon as we got into the trailer, Zendaya attacked my lips with hers and pushed me against the wall. I let it happen. I was trying to forget about everything.

I decided to pull her to the back where my bed was. I wasted no time pushing her onto the bed and sucking her neck lightly.

My phone was now in my elastic band and it was vibrating like crazy. I stopped what I was doing to Z and sat beside her to answer the call without looking at the ID.

"Hello?" I said grumpily.
Z sat up on my bed and looked at me as the other voice spoke to me, "Y/N?" It was Dinah.
"Well, it's not the damn Easter Bunny." I wasn't going to try to filter what I was thinking. I was done with that.
"Woah. You sound drunk."
"Cool."
"What the hell is wrong with you? First you don't answer Lauren or Ally, then you break it off with Camila, and now you're being mean?" She was obviously mad too.

Zendaya got up from the bed and turned to me, "I think I'm gonna go." She kissed my cheek and turned her body to walk towards the door.
I grabbed her arm, "You don't have to."
"I'll see you tomorrow, hopefully." She whispered grabbing her heels from the front of the trailer and slipping them on before walking out.

"Y/N! What the hell is wrong with you?" Dinah screamed into the receiver.
"I saw the pictures of Camila and Jacob. They weren't faked, they weren't because of management. She was with h-him, Dinah. I have nothing more to say about it. She's done this to me twice." I replied honestly.
"Look, I get it wasn't right but-"
"So, it was true. You didn't deny it. That's enough for me." I interrupted her.
"If you don't let me talk, I swear to god I'm going to beat yo ass." She warned me. I stayed quiet and laid back on my bed. "You need to let her explain."
"I don't want to let her explain. This has to be the shittiest day of my life. Plus, none of this excuses her not telling me happy birthday at all today." I could feel myself growing more and more exhausted.
DJ stopped, "Wait, she didn't tell you happy birthday?"
"Nope. I'm just as surprised as you. Look, I'm tired and I have to work tomorrow so I'm gonna go. Tell Ally and Lauren I'm sorry but I can't talk to them yet. I just need to forget." I quickly hung up before Dinah could reply.

--

Halley woke me up by pushing me off the side of my bed. I groaned opening my eyes to see the bright sun break through my window. It felt like there were a thousand sledgehammers beating my head up. Ew, sledgehammer.

I got up from off the floor and I could feel my stomach start to act up. I knew I was about to puke. I ran to the bathroom and cuddled the toilet while puking my guts out.

Halley came into the bathroom and grabbed a hair tie from the sink, "Oh god. You're such a mess." She pulled my tangled hair into a tight bun while I released every bit of alcohol I had drank last night into the porcelain bowl. She sweetly rubbed my back as I wretched. I was completely regretting everything I consumed the night before, but everything was basically a blur. I don't even fully remember getting in the trailer. I just know Zendaya was with me.
"How much did you drink last night?" Halley asked sitting down beside me to comfort me.
I finally stopped for a moment to answer her, "A lot."
"Wow, Sherlock. I couldn't tell." She sassily replied.

I got up from the floor to flush the toilet then look at myself in the mirror. I was pale with deep dark circles under my eyes. I looked wrecked, and I felt like I was wrecked too. Even though I couldn't remember last night, I knew what caused last night. Camila caused last night and everything that happened after that.

"I bet you regret going out now, huh?" Halley joked.
I shook my head, "I regret the after math but nothing more."
"Well, you have a scene to shoot in 3 hours but it's only 12 so you need some lunch." She smiled getting closer to the door to leave the bathroom. She waited in the door way and looked at me, "So, get dressed and we'll eat on the lot."
I nodded to reply to her. Not really feeling up for food, but I know that if I don't eat now, all my energy will be gone by tonight.

--

When we got to the restaurant on the lot, the first person I saw was Jennifer. I quickly took a seat by her and smiled.
"What if that seat was taken?" She smirked raising one eye brow.
"You have friends?" I replied casually.
"You're lucky you're cute because it's so easy to be nice to you, y/n."
"I know." I jokingly replied with false confidence.
She just giggled a little, "Shut up."

Halley brought over our food and took a seat beside me. Jennifer started to tear into her chili cheese fries with a fork when she looked up at me, "Did you hear?"
I smiled. "That I'm pretty cool? Yeah. Some people told me that the other day and-"
She jokingly slapped my arm, "No. We're going on site on the 16-18th to film."
"Where?" I asked taking a fry and putting it into my mouth.
"Toronto." She smiled grabbing a napkin and wiping her hands.
My mouth dropped, "Um, are you sure?" Jen nodded.

The 17th is the day the girls are gonna be in Toronto. I don't even want to be in the vicinity of Camila. That will just make me emotional. I don't want to go. Not at all.

My phone started ringing with the song 'Girls by the 1975'. It was Lauren.

I groaned and looked at the contact screen to assure myself it was her. "I gotta take this."

I got up from my table and started walking to the side of the restaurant. "Hello?" I said into the receiver.
"It's about damn time you answer me." She replied half-joking, half-serious.
"Yeah, about that. I-"
"I don't care, y/n." Her voice was stern. "Look, I'm not gonna sugar coat things for you. None of us knew about what was going on with Camila and Jacob. We wouldn't have let it happen. We love you, okay? You can be mad at Camila all you want but don't push us out, too. We're like a family here."
I sighed out, "I really love you girls too and I'm happy to hear y'all didn't know it was happening. It's just that the only reason I'm trying to ignore you guys is because you're Camila's friends before mine. Everytime I think about you, I think about her. I just can't do it anymore."
"Can't? We've all been friends for 3 years. Just as long as Camila. We've bonded just as much as the next. I'm not giving up on a friendship just because Camila was being stupid." Lauren answered honestly. I just kept quiet as I tried to process everything in my head, "She's really sad, though." She softly added.
"Good."
"You don't mean that. I know you don't."
"Yes, I do. I was sad when I found out she was all over Jacob. Didn't I deserve to be sad? She deserves to be crushed. I mean, if I even meant anything to her. I guess I didn't." I wasn't going to be fake about it.
She sighed out, "What she did wasn't right, but you didn't have to break up with her."
"Really? You're taking her side? Lauren, she was with him all day and didn't bother to call or text me happy birthday. Not at all. Even her Mom remembered to call. Even fucking Shawn Mendes remembered to tweet me." I was a little more aggravated now.
"She didn't tell you happy birthday?" Lauren said just as surprised as Dinah.
"Why does everyone say it like that? No. She didn't. She called me at 12AM the next morning while I was at a club and I told her to fuck off. I didn't want to, but I'm tired of all the lying. She can have fun with Jacob. I'm sure she's been doing that for a while now."
"How can you be so cold? She loves you so much. Yeah, what she did was shitty, but you don't have to be a dick about it." Lauren said getting equally aggravated.
"How long?"
"Huh?"
"How long was she doing this? She's probably told you. I want to know." I demanded.
Lauren paused for a second then sighed, "Since a little bit before tour." I was more hurt than I had been before. A tear softly dropped down my cheek. I couldn't say anything. I just wiped it away. "Y/N? Are you there?"
I sniffled, "Yeah, Lo. I gotta go."
"No. You're not gonna stop this conversation." She warned.
"We can continue it soon. I have to eat and film. I'll see you in Toronto." Did I just say that? My filter needs to be reconstructed because I blurt out the dumbest shit sometimes.
"Toronto?"
"Ugh, never mind." I quickly replied.
"Tell me!"
"I just found out that we'll be in Toronto the same day you will, but don't tell the other girls. Okay? I didn't even mean to tell you." Being honest right now could only help me.
"Can I at least see you? I need to know that you're alright. Not only with me but just all together." She replied with a soft voice. She has a hard outer shell but a gooey inside.
"I guess. I'll text you when I'm there. Okay?" Lauren is the only person I'm actually willing to see at this point.
"Okay. See you then. Just remember this isn't over." She replied before hanging up the call.