Her Bad Habits!

"New Chances!"

**6 Months Later**

**Alex's POV**

(Sighs), So Sam is pregnant...well with not my baby of course, it's that asshole she calls a husband. Kira..refuses to talk to me. Oh? Yes Kira is alive, lemme tell you what went down...exactly 6 Months ago. So i got busted for cheating with my teacher and when i tried explaining my girlfr- I mean ex girlfriend got hit by a car. "I took her lifeless body in my arms, as i begged her to open her eyes, I told her...that i loved her. I silently prayed to God that she'll open her eyes, well she did but not cause my prayer worked. I looked at her half opened eyes, full of tears, pain and fear. She coughed up blood and mumbled some words up..."I...hate you." I fully understood why, i did her wrong. After a few minutes of struggling, an ambulance finally showed up and paramedics took her from my arms as i sobbed drastically, covered in her blood. I felt too much, i was scared..i coul- couldn't breath."

"I woke up in a cold room,white..well in the hospital, i could tell by the monitors beeping. My vision felt blurry, my throat was dry and my head was pounding painfully. "Water?" I whispered and Selena gave me a sip. My memory was blurred up, i couldn't remember what had happened before this. "What happened?" I asked,"No..umm where's Kira, you know my girlfriend?" I continued. Selena let out a very cold sigh. "Umm Kira was involved in an accident...you don't remember Peach?" Selena asked. "Remember what? Kira? Wait? No no no!" I thought to myself and passed out. Well a lot of that kept happening, me panicking then passing out. On the 2nd day i was released from the hospital. I hoped and prayed to see her. I went over to her ward and saw her beautiful face, despite the bandage around her head. I walked over to her...rehearsing my words over and over in my head. 

"Hey." I said as i got close to her. She turned to face me with her beautiful eyes, and quickly turned away while uttering these words,"Go away Lex, I never wanna see you again." Pain, sadness and disappointment was hinted in her voice. "I'm sorry, i honestly regret my decisions." I said as i walked away. That night i decided to write her a message to tell her how i felt. "Hey Kira, i know you don't wanna talk to me right now and it's totally understandable, if i was you i wouldn't talk to me either. But Kira i want you to know that i'm sorry, sorry about everything. I love you Shakira Coleman, more than you'll ever know and i hope you'll forgive because i cannot imagine my life without you. I want you, I need you. I need to call you, text you, hold you, kiss you, i need to tell you that i...love you."

I never believed in love or love never believed in me. I lose all those i love, hurt or disappoint them. I'm not worthy of love, protection and  security. I don't deserve to be loved.

So that has been happening. I am writing my finals next week so i thought i should use this week to fix my relationship with Kira, the last message from her was, "Yes, i'm okay...so stop texting me." And that was like a week ago. So tomorrow I'm planning on going to see her and we been seeing a therapist well individually but same person. Her name is Lwazi Mdluli, in her late 20's and is actually a great therapist. So in a few minutes i got an appointment with her. Selena decided to drive today cause she says she doesn't want me driving in this state. So i got there just in time for my session.

"Welcome Pumpkin." She greeted as i entered. I adore Lwazi so much because she reminds me of Tracy a lot. I take my sit and look at her, you know waiting for her to say something. "How are we doing today?" She asks. I sigh and rubbed my temples. "Honestly i don't know." I said.

"I don't wanna move on. I need her, I..can't live, breathe without her. I can't stop loving her and i don't want her to stop loving me. So i'm sorry i am such a fuck up, that refuses to progress." I said as i gently sobbed. I sat there waiting for Lwazi to say something. She looked at me and then shared a warm smile. "I'm not forcing you to move on my love, and don't force yourself. Take your time and trust the process okay?" She said to me. I gently nodded and asked for my session to end earlier than it's supposed to. I got home and chunked a handful of sleeping pills..jokes only 2 and i passed out. I woke up at 04:00 am and made coffee as i gently went through Kira's Instagram. 

Have you ever looked at someone and wondered how you got so lucky with them? Like damn. That's how I felt when I looked at Kira. 

Before I knew it, it was 08:30 am, i had fallen asleep again. I woke up, took a long shower. Brushed my hair, got dressed...nothing special just basketball shorts, an over sized tee and sneakers, looking like a real gentleman haha. I went downstairs had coffee again, and started driving to the principal's house, well because after that whole accident he and his wife took her in. I was so anxious honestly. I parked in the drive way and texted for Kira to come out cause there was no way i was coming in. She came out wearing this beautiful blue dress, that ended just 5 inches above her knees. Had her hair tied up in a high Afro puff, gold necklace around her neck and holding a hoodie. She walked over to the car and got in. "Hey." I said. "Hey?" She responded without even looking at me. Cold! I thought to myself. I started driving, first we got coffee then drove to the park. The drive was very quiet, not even any eye contact made. We got to the park and sat by the picnic tables. "So...can we talk now?" I blurted out cause honestly i was tired of all this silence. "Talk." She said as she placed her phone on the table and cold stared at me. 

I sigh and rubbed my eyes. "Look, i'm sorry.." I said. "Yes, bluh bluh..you're sorry. Didn't mean for it to happened, you regret it...I know Lex okay? I know." She said...with  compassion in her voice. "Wait, does this mean you forgive me?" I questioned as my eyes shone brightly. "Look, it's been what? 6 months? I'm tired honestly...of being angry, sad...it's just tiring, just so exhausting. And besides I...kinda miss you." She said...while she fidgeted with her fingers and innocently smiled at me. She missed me? Oh what the fuck? I MISSED HER!!!

I stood up and wrapped my arms around her, picking her up. I got a whiff of her scent, her seductive scent which umm..kept me on my toes all the time. I put her down and gazed into her beautiful eyes as she looked up to mine. "Does this mean you love me again?" I innocently asked as i brushed my thumb against her cheek. "I never stopped loving you, dummy." She replied with a warm smile. Fuck! I missed that. I then kissed her, felt her love, felt my strength coming back to me, my happiness. 

It felt so good being in love with her... :)