my world

part 13

It was just after Lorenzos funeral. A week today he died. I stood at his grave. Just staring at it. I couldn't process he was really gone. I felt an arm snake round my waist. "Ruby said she'll take the kids for a few hours so we have some time to ourselves.." my husbands voice rang through my ears

I turned to face him after a few moments and collapsed in his arms, sobbing. Its all I seem to do now. What was supposed to be one of the happiest few days if our lifes. Turned into hell. It was technically boxing day when he died. It had just turned midnight.

I miss him so much.. my second child I've lost. First Sofia's twin now Lorenzo too. My sweet boy..
I hate this. This life. I wish I never came back. I wish I was still in that stupid cell. Getting abused and raped every day. It was far less pain then this.

I tried pulling away from my husbands grip but he only gripped onto Me tighter. Not letting me go. "Please don't go." I don't know why but it hit me. How much he's gone through. How many people he's lost.

His parents within 2 days if eachother. Then "me" and after that he lost himself! Then he list his second wife, even if he didn't live her it wouldve been traumatising. One of his babies. Now Lorenzo?! Who was next?!

I looked up into his eyes and saw they were red and puffy. He immediately looked away from me, embarrassed.

"Hey.. its okay. I'm your wife. Your allowed to cry. No one's around, let it out." I felt his tears fall onto my shoulder. I just wanted him to be happy. Whenever he's happy, it gets took away so fast. Maybe I'm the problem. Ever since I got here. Everything's been going wrong.

I heard him sniffle and pull away from the hug while wiping his eyes. "Can we just go home.." he whispered while choking on his words.

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As we lay in bed in silence, Sofia began screaming. Neither of us got up knowing Ruby and Mateo were looking after her. But then I heard Luca yelling, it sounded like he was crying.

I got up and began walking downstairs. As soon as I walked into the lounge Luca hugged me. I lifted him up and hugged him back. "Its okay.. why don't you go up to My room, we'll have a family cuddle?" I smiled while putting him down. He quickly ran off upstairs.

I walked over to Mateo who was holding Sofia. She was still crying but less then before. "I'll take her.. its fine." I held her close to my body, kissing her head.

I pushed the bedroom door open and saw Luca and Gabriel all cuddled up already. "So rude! Let us in!" I joked as Gabriel lifted his other arm up for me.

We all lay there, cuddled up together. Sofia was on Gabriel's chest staring at him. She's definitely a Daddy's girl. Before I knew it I had fallen asleep.

*Gabriel's pov*

Mt wife and son/brother had both fallen asleep leaving me and my daughter, Sofia. "Hey Sof.." she looked at me. She was ging to be smart. You could tell. "I love you so much.. I'm gonna protect you from everything! Including boys.. your not allowed to date untill your 18!" I whispered with a smile.

"Me ans your Mama met when she was 20. I think thats good for when you meet your future husband." I paused for a second, "Actually.. your not allowed to get married either. You have to stay little forever. My little girl." I chickled at myself as she stared at me blankly, I cant wait for her first smile.

"Maybe I should put you in your crib.." I stood up and walked to the crib just a couple of feet away from the bed and placed her in it carefully. "Goodnight Sofia.."

I placed a kiss on her head as I walked back over to the bed. No one was actually under the duvet so I covered it over them both. I lay down back in the spot I was sat in before. With my family surrounding me.

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I woke up the next morning to Sofia crying and everyone slowly opening their eyes. "I'll get her don't worry.." my wife whispered while walking over to my daughters crib.

Luca jumped ontop of me. "Can we have pancakes?!" I looked at the clock on the wall. "Buddy it's 6 30 in the morning.. let's go back to sleep for a while..." I grumbled while burying my face into Gabriel's chest.

I could feel Luca moving around and grabbed him, wedging him inbetween Gabriel and I. "Go to sleep." I hissed at him. I needed sleep. I haven't slept properly in over a week.

Just as everything went silent again, Sofia began crying. I let out a long groan before getting out of the comfort of my bed and Gabriel's arms.

"Sweetie come on can you please sleep a bit longer.." I whispered while picking her up and bringing her over to the bed. I knew she's probably hungry so took of Gabriel's T-shirt leaving me in my tank top and bra.

I sat there letting her drink as Gabriel sturred awake from me and Luca talking. He sat up and saw I was feeding Sofia which in his words was "boobie time".

"I think daddy should get some time with the boobies too at some point" Luca and I cringed. "I'm ten I'm not dumb! I know what that means and I don't want to hear about it!" Luca hissed at Gabriel making me erupt into laughter.

"Sorry mate.. how about you go into your room? Or go bother Ruby and Mateo?" Gabriel awkwardly laughed as Luca got up and left.

"Will daddy get some boobie time any point soon?" He smirked at me.

"Mummy just gave birth 8 days meaning we have another 82 days untill we can have boobie time." I spoke in a high pitch voice as if I was talking to our baby.

"82 days?!?! What?!?! Loveeee... you know I can't last that long without sex!!!" He whined like a little boy. I rolled my eyes at him jokingly.

"You lasted 5 years. You can last 3 months. You'll have to make do with blow job's and hand jobs!" He let out a long groan. You'd think that's terrible wouldn't you?

I chuckled at him before moving closer to him and resting my head against his shoulder. He had a perfect view of my boob that Sofia was feeding off of. He was certainly taking the opportunity to stare. Definitely a boobs guy.