Don't Go There

i'm yours

[a/n: this fic was recently rewritten entirely. if the comments don't make sense that's why!]

       He kissed you hard, and you two stumbled backward into the house. Your foot luckily kicked the door shut just before it was out of reach. This kiss, much like the last, became urgent fast, both of you daring to touch places you hadn't before. You both fumbled with getting each other's coats off with one hand each as you explored each other's bodies with your remaining free hands. You pulled him as close as possible to you, while his fingers snuck up the back of your loose shirt. Your heads turned this way and that, and you didn't deny him when his tongue slid across your bottom lip.

Suddenly your back was against a wall, and the heat between you two was almost overwhelming. With limited mobility now, the intensity died down gradually, your long and hot kiss turning more to sweet, repetitive kisses. Slow, and not particularly careful or neat. His nose bumped yours, and you guys stood for only seconds in silence trying to catch your breath before Alex spoke gently, eyes shut and his forehead on yours.

"I think I might be in love with you."

You stifled a small noise of relief, inhaling sharply but near silently instead. Those words were music to your ears, and for a moment, you thought you might be floating. This was everything you'd hoped for and fantasized about and then some.
But then, reality hit again, and you remembered how little time you guys had.

"Alex..."

"I know you're leaving," he cut you off. "I know you only have a couple days left in town, but I couldn't leave tomorrow without seeing you."

Your heart fluttered at the thought of him missing you. There was a touching satisfaction in knowing this whole time he'd been thinking of you too-- but you had to go to your own defense, "I tried. I tried calling and texting for days. You wouldn't answer."

"I hated being away from you," he turned from you, hands clasped behind his head. "But I couldn't stand the thought of you with Michael. Couldn't tolerate the idea of him getting to kiss you instead of me."

"I never let him," you quickly confessed. "I never let him kiss me. How could I when I only wanted you? Still only want you?"

And with a flash of a childlike smirk, you were tightly wrapped in his arms again. "Y/N, you have no idea how much you mean to me. I think about you every hour of the day; every minute I'm away from you is one I'm wishing I was with you."

You looked up at him, awestruck, "Then I'm yours."

"You... think we can handle the distance?" He didn't look as hopeful as he sounded.

And here came the truth. You knew he was still going to Brown, and you'd be here alone. At this moment though, you didn't care. You two would find a way to make it work. You swallowed before speaking again, and your gaze fell to the floor.

"Remember when I asked you to meet me at the cafe?"

"Yes," Alex replied slowly. "What's that got to do with anything?"

You took a deep breath, then admitted, "I never got to tell you my real news."

His brows furrowed as he tried to recall you guys' conversation. When it was clear he remembered the fake story you'd given him, he scanned the room for something before saying, "Hey... there's not even a kitten here. You said..."

"I lied," you looked back to his face, where his confusion was deep and abundant. "Just, come home from school as often as possible. Or maybe we can meet halfway but... I'll be here. Your aunt agreed to let me stay until--"

"I'm staying," he cut in, his tone not leaving room for debate.

"What? Alex, no, you can't give up Brown for me," guilt immediately started seeping in. This was exactly what you feared would happen if you told him.

"It's already given up, I wasn't asking your permission," he stepped close again, looking meaningfully in your eyes. "A degree is a degree, Y/N. I'll never find another you."

You reasoned with yourself that this was why you wanted to tell him about your staying, to give him a choice. And now that he'd made a choice, you'd be out of place to force him one way or the other. Your chest could hardly contain the swelling of your heart; you wanted to jump up and soar through the sky. You showered his face in kisses instead, much to his enjoyment. You let yourself relax in his tight embrace, and he even gave you your movie moment, lifting your feet off the ground to spin you. Once you were standing again, he looked down at you with his perfect lips in a sleepy grin.

"Besides," he added. "Brown's not the only school I got accepted to, I got into the community one you mentioned too. Honestly, I never expected to get into any Ivy League and only applied as a shot in the dark."

You squeezed his hand, trying to will your remaining guilt away, "Are you sure it's okay?"

"More than sure," he kissed your forehead. "Plus now I get to start this fall rather than this week. And, I also just so happen to know of an apartment opening."

Your eyes that were teary only seconds ago opened wide with excitement, "You're kidding, where?"

You two swayed with your arms around each other as he answered, "By a certain little pond that known for it's exceptional mud pies."

You nearly had to pinch yourself to make sure this was real life: it was.

"But we can talk about that later," Alex tucked some hair behind your ear, and tilted your chin up to kiss you again after saying, "Just let me be happy that I'm yours, and you're finally mine."