Reaching beyond the Shadows

Chapter 7

Asher's POV

Today is the day that Logan moves in, Kayden has his game, and our parents are coming to watch. Thankfully our parents won't be staying in our apartment since Logan will be staying with us. My anxiety has been through the roof due to so much happening in only a few hours. Kayden could see my being anxious and shaking this morning and made me take my anxiety pills that i don't like taking. I personally don't like to rely on medicine, but sometimes it does help.

"You wanna go grab something to eat after practice?" Jessica asks Allee and i
"Yeah, who's going?" I ask
"Just Olivia, Miley, and hopefully you Allee and i" she responds
"I'm cool with it where are we eating?" I ask
"Ashton's on 64th street" she responds
Allee pops in on our conversation "omg Ashton has the best kids Mac n cheese"
We all giggle at her
"Who's going?" She asks
"If you want to go it would be Olivia, Miley, and Jessica" i respond
"Oh sounds good" she responds
"Sweet anybody need a ride?" Jessica asks since she's a senior
"Nope i got allee and i" i respond
"I'm take Olivia so we should be good" Miley responds
"Ok girls, i know there's a football game tonight and idk who's going but i still have to give the same speech" our coach says to use while we finish up stretching
"You are an athlete at this school and on this team. Please be responsible, i care for all of you and i never want to kick any of you off the team due to a dumb decision" she always tells us.
"No problem Coach i think Asher's the only one who's really going" Olivia responds
"Ok we'll Asher be safe please" she tells me
"I will coach thank you, i don't plan on partying" i laugh a little
"My parents are coming to watch my brother" i informed her
"Oh ok well i hope you enjoy it, I'd also would love to meet them sometime" she respond
I tried to hide my disappointment "yeah totally" with a fake smile.

My parents never cared about me or my sport. As much as i wish they had enough love and care to come watch me and meet my coach, i also would never want them to meet any of these people i call my family. I would be extremely embarrassed about how my parents would act towards the other parents and coaches. They know absolutely nothing about gymnastics but they're one of those parents who acts like they know everything. Just because they were/are big star athletes doesn't mean they know everything about ever sport. I also wouldn't want pity faces from the other families. I already get a little right now but always use the excuse of being the youngest of 5.

"Hey you ok?" Allee asks pulling me out of my own thoughts
"Yeah, I'm fine"
"Bullshit, i know that comment Coach made hurt you didn't it" she can see right through me
"I mean of course it does a little. But at the same time i don't ever want my parents to meet my coach after they've given up on trying to understand gymnastics. It would just be embarrassing." I respond truthfully
"Yeah i understand that, but i know you wish they cared for you like they do for your other siblings"
"Yeah, but i can't do anything about it so why dwell on it"
"That's a good way to think about it"
I was pulling up to our apartment building. We finished eating with the team awhile ago, which was a lot of fun. Miley decided to see how many French fries she can shove into her mouth at once. Sometimes i wonder how they even got into college. Sadly i had to come back to the reality of getting ready to see my parents. They were coming to the apartment first to keep some of their stuff here since we were coming back to our apartment after the game.

"Do you want to do something tomorrow to get your mind off of what will happen tonight?" Allee asked before we split up to go to our apartments.

"That sounds great, thank you" i respond
She goes in for a huge, knowing tonight will be hard for me
"I'm only a phone call away" she assures me

"Love you bitch" i respond
"Love you too asshole" she says back

Once i unlock the door and walk into the apartment I'm immediately meet with a beyond clean apartment. Kayden and i are very organized people so our apartments usually clean, but this was extremely clean. Like i can see a clear reflection of myself on the kitchen counter top that's how clean it was. Kayden comes walking in from the hallway with some type of spray bottle and washcloth.

"Oh good your finally home" he says putting down the cleaning supplies on the counter

I'm in literal shock, I'm always the one who cleans everything when mother and father come. Doesn't matter where our house, bedroom, apartment, anything.

"You cleaned?!" With amazement and thankfulness
"Yeah i mean i know how much stress and anxiety mom and dad put on you and i thought i could do one thing to maybe make it slightly easier" he said shrugging his shoulders but also hoping it was okay to do so

I put my bags and stuff down and go to hug him. I wrap my arms around his neck while he wraps his around my back. "Thank you Kayden that means a lot" i say into his shoulder. I could cry, even though Kayden can be the biggest pain in my ass, he's the most understanding, caring, and protective brother i could've asked for.

"Of course" he responds
Once we let go i walk over to grab my stuff and put it all away.
"Logan will be here in 10 mins and mother and father will be here in about 20 so you might want to go take your shower and get ready" he informs me while looking at his phone

"What? I thought they were coming for another hour"
"Idek what's going on Asher that's what they just texted me" he says rubbing his eyes with a say of frustration

With that realization i run to my room yelling out to Kayden "that's okay I'll be in my room for awhile so DONT TALK TO ME UNTIL MOTHER AND FARHER ARE HERE"
He laughs at my outburst and craziness while i close the door to my room and start getting ready.

While half way through doing my makeup i hear Logan walk through the front door. Oh no has it already been 10 mins?!! Ok ok i can do this, i can get ready in time and mentally prepare myself.

In the next 10 mins i finished my makeup and face stickers, i put my hair in two Dutch braids for Kayden since he always plays well with them, i have a Penn State shirt on with Kayden's football jacket her got personally made for me with our last name and his number on it with black jeans and white converse.

While I'm putting my earrings and necklaces on the front door opens again this time i hear my mother and father's voices. My heart literally drops to my stomach and my anxiety goes through the roof. 'Breathe, in and out Asher you can do this. It's just for one night.' I pep talk to myself.

I walk out of my room with a goal, to stay as invisible as possible so i can't get hurt. If they don't know your there they won't say anything towards you right? Well that type goal goes out the window as soon as i enter the kitchen. Logan and my parents are the only ones in the kitchen and as soon as they all see me my mother yells at me "Asher, we we're in the middle of a conversation with Kayden's lovely teammate Logan before you so rudely interrupted us with your presence."

Logan looks at me with wide eyes, probably think 'did she really just say that?' Yes as usual.

"I'm very sorry for interrupting mother" i respond with my head down not wanting any attention brought upon me.
I walk towards Logan "where's Kayden?"
"He's in his room grabbing something we're about to head to the stadium" he says while i nod
I continue to stand next to him hoping the attention will just leave me and go back to him.
Thankfully it does
"So Logan before we were so rudely interrupted where are you from?"
"I was born and grew up near Destin Florida but moved my junior year to North Carolina due to my dads job" while he responds I'm murdering the callous's on my hands due to the stress, fear, and anxiety my parents cause.

Once Logan finishes answering he puts his hand in the soul of my back and runs it up and down my back to comfort me. i freeze not understanding what's happening but it surprisingly is comforting.