Burn (Finished! Working on sequel!)

Finding new love: Ages 11 - 15

The moment when the man looked at me with those kind eyes, stood up and walked to the door, turning back and saying those painful words: "No, I am not who you think I am, Emerson." I looked at him with pain and anguish, "Why." I croaked. "Why did you have to do this to me...?" I looked at him with sad eyes. I closed them. "Get out." I grit my teeth, pointing outside. He obeyed and I haven't seen him in a while, but he did return.

***

Why me? I would always think whenever something bad happened to me. I know I shouldn't be complaining, but it just wasn't fair. One day, my Mother came up to me and we had just ended a large fight. "Emerson... You have to understand something."

She looked at me with a stern face. "Life. Isn't. Fair. " Those words that came out of her mouth that day, followed with a hard slap on my face. A blot of red merged with my cheek. She looked down at me again. "And it never will be fair."

Those words, they guided my life from then on, I never went to school again. I had learned my lesson and I chose to teach myself on what I needed to know- not what some teacher told me I needed to know.

I followed this rule all my life, yet it never seemed to make sense. One day, at the age of 13, I entered high school for the first time, ever. Picture all these kids who had been in school for years, and they had friends. Hallways were bright and the classrooms smelled distinctly of hand-sanitizer.

I sat down, looking around. Guess who sits right in-front of me? A cute boy. I learned that his name was Caleb soon after we took role. The teacher came up to me. She looked old and funky, so I tried not to laugh. "Young lady, you are out of dress code." She pointed at my top, which was a low cut. I didn't see anything wrong with that.

I rubbed right above my eye, making sure that my mascara was not going to smear, I looked back at her. "Excuse me, what?" I said in a kind-of-rude tone. "Your shirt- she looked down at my breasts and I flinched. "Hey- keep your eyes off of those." I blew her off, and she went back to her desk. She dialed a number and started talking in a muffled tone.

People in all directions looked at me. They started laughing quietly, thinking this was some kind of a joke. The boy in front of me, Caleb, turned around and talked to me for the first time ever. In-fact, he was the only person who had talked to me since I had lived in Hawaii.

But, this was the first day back into school, for everyone, but still. It was amazing. "You really are a funny girl, Emerson." He smiled at me, and me eyes sparkled at him. I started to space out, looking at him. "Huh, what? Oh, thank you." He laughed, turning back around.

He then hesitated, turning back around. My nose was put in a book. "Hey- uh. You wouldn't happen to be single would you?" My face shot straight up from the book.

I looked at him, trying to play it cool. "Oh, yeah. I just broke up with someone, but yeah." I gave him a grin. Come to think of it, I never even met a guy, nonetheless dated one. "Well, uh. If that's the case, wanna come to the park with me this afternoon?" Yes! "Oh, is that how it is?" I laughed. "Sure." Just then the bell rang. Score! Got a first date with the guy I like, and he's cute!

That night, I kept my hair up in the bun it was already in and put on some chap-stick, only a little bit, and then re-doing my make-up. Heading outside to the park, Which was about a 7 minute walk from my house, I spotted a familiar car. There was a man inside and he was watching me from the window.

I was a bit confused, yet creeped out. I looked at my watch, checking the time. "Twelve minutes." I muttered under my breath, walking a bit faster.

A engine revved in the distance, which got me nervous because that engine sounded familiar, which I had heard in my younger years, 2 1/2 years ago to be exact, I started to sprint, getting scared now. I saw Caleb and raced to him.

"Dang, you're a fast runner, huh." He looked a bit surprised. "Yeah, but I can't run as fast because, when I was little, I fractured my hip bone." I added. "Ah, I see. Well, come sit." He patted the bench, having me sit next to him.

We started up a conversation and his blonde hair would occasionally blow in his face in the breeze. His tan skin, from living in Hawaii, was perfect in the moonlight. Everyone in Hawaii was tan to an extent after living there over the years.

He started to get a bit anxious, but then I understood why. He grabbed my shoulders, pulled him close to him, and he locked his lips with mine. The sensation of feeling his skin touch mine sent chills though my body. I smiled, returning the favor. After I pulled away, we both started to blush a deep red.

"Well, this was nice." I commented. It was awkward since he sat in-front or close to me in all of my classes. "Well, uh. See you tomorrow?" I nodded, waving a goodbye and started home. He stopped me by grabbing my hand, yanking me back. He hugged me, then let me go. "Bye, Emerson...!" He called out to me.

***

I now was finally able to know what love felt like, it was like all your emotions came into one, and kind of made a humongous firework and then all the ashes rained down over all the world, so everyone would know what love was like.

After dating him for two years, we had finally hit Junior year in high school. Things had started to change, though. He stopped hanging out with me less and less, eventually, one day, ignoring me altogether. That's when I found out, It was over.

This was the moment, looking back all those years ago: From that fight that my mom and I had had, The pain of knowing that life isn't fair, now the moment finally struck me, I would never get anything I wanted or deserved, life never goes the way you want it to.

I ran home as soon as I could, and buried my face into my pillow, letting the mascara stain into it. That would be my reminder. Life is never, ever fair. I continued to bawl into the pillow, never wanting to come out of my room again. I didn't go to school the next day. Or the next. Or the day after that. Finally, the days added up to the point to where my teachers started calling my mother, wondering if I was okay.

She told them that I was, in fact, going to school. She watched me get on that big yellow bus every day and go to school. The truth was, I got off that bus as soon as it got to school, ran home, waited for my mom to go to work, and stayed in the house for the rest of the day.

I was forced to go the next day. The entire day, I was stuck in the principals office, to make sure that I didn't leave. Eventually, the office became a regular place for me to stay all day. My pain and guilt had overridden me. Anguish flooded my mind, clouding my eyes. I thought I would never love again.

Finally, I gave in and chose to go roam the halls one day. The thing that will always haunt me to this day, Is seeing Caleb with that stupid, forgotten girl, holding hands and embracing faces, kissing right in front of me.

I will never forget that moment when Caleb said those words: "It's not what it looks like...!" I looked at him with very sad eyes. "Oh, really?" My eyes started to burn that reddish gold color, like they would occasionally, when something really awesome or terrible happened.

"You know what, this is what it looks like." I started to rat him out. All my anger and hormones came out at once. The principal had to come get me. He brought me to his office and sat me down. "Emerson, you know what...?" The words that were imprinted into my mind kept playing over and over. Finally, the old man had to go and spit them into my face just to rub all my pain in.

"Life. Isn't. Fair."