fake it til you make it | greta van fleet

a kind stranger | three

If emotional whiplash was a thing, then you were most certainly suffering from it. Really, there was an ache in your joints–or maybe that was just the exhaustion getting to you. You weren't sure how much longer you could keep up with it all.

Hannah Montana had lost all meaning to you over the past two and a half weeks. There was absolutely, positively, no possible way a teenage girl had been able to live and keep up with a double life. You were struggling, and the only secret you had was the fact that your relationship with Josh was fake.

Well, that and the fact that you were certain your feelings for him were not fake in the slightest.

Playing house with Josh was easy. It was a breeze, really, to let yourself sink into the reality where he was more than just your friend. The touching, the stupid pet names, the longing stares... those were child's play.

No, the real struggle was keeping the ruse going whenever he wasn't around. It wasn't often that his presence was lacking, considering the two of you were practically inseparable anymore, but when he was–oh, boy. You were a trainwreck.

It was well and truly a miracle you hadn't blown the entire thing. Each time you were alone with Beth or Marjorie, you had to actively remind yourself that as far as they knew you'd already scored Josh. All you really wanted to do, though, was lament to them about the horrors of your pining.

You wanted to vent, and whine, and mope all about how you were fairly certain you actually were in love with him. You wanted to cry, and wail, and bemoan the sorrow of only being his friend. Especially, though, you wanted to gripe about the fact that you felt as if he were toying with you.

You couldn't do any of that, though.

That was the one thing you really hadn't considered when you'd caved to Josh's little scheme. You hadn't thought about the fact that he'd essentially stripped you of any agency. He'd spun this tale to your two confidants, the only people in the world you'd ever have considered going to about your feelings, and now you felt isolated.

You weren't blaming him. Partially due to his nature and the still alarming fact that it was impossible for you to feel angry with him. But, you also knew that you had the biggest hand in the scenario.

It had been you that let him lie. It had been you who had went along with it all. And, at the end of the day, it had been you who had kept up with it well past the agreed upon window of a few days.

To be fair, you'd somewhat been expecting him to grow tired of the ruse rather quickly. You had anticipated that after a few days he'd have grown bored and asked to call it all off, but that hadn't happened. He'd never brought it up, and you were an opportunist who was milking the situation for all it was worth, and now weeks had gone by and you were starting to deal with the consequences.

The fallout was sure to be catastrophic.

Dramatics aside, Beth and Marjorie were entirely enamored with Josh, and your relationship. They were constantly fawning over him whenever he came around, and the gushing didn't seem to ever end. You'd been receiving random texts from the two of them ever since they'd met Josh raving about how perfect he was, and how happy they were for you.

If only they knew the truth. If only they knew that the pet names they squealed over, and the tender touches they sobbed about, and the love-sick antics they envied were all fake. That's where the emotional whiplash came into play.

Interacting with Josh whenever the two of you were playing this weird, twisted game was entirely different than when the two of you were alone. In public, it was second nature for you to tangle your fingers in between his own. It was natural to cling to him, and feel his hands all over you.