HIM AND I

Chapter 16

After doing the project for a bit, we decided to study and it seems like forever. I hear the rumors but wasn't sure. Now, seating in front of the star champion of our college football team, I know it. Gavin Lockwood sucks in economics. I look at the table full of my notes, four coffee mugs.. Wait?! What! I drank this much coffee in the last 3 hours?! I rub my head and suddenly start laughing. I don't know exactly why I am laughing but it just feels right. Gavin looks at me like I am crazy from the table, where his head is lying.

" What? Are you laughing at me?! Oh, fuck off. " He says while hitting his head on the coffee table in front of him.

" Why? Why? " I say between my laughter.. " Why did you take economics as your major if you were never interested in it? " He looks at me again but with a different look. He smiles lazily.

" I hate economics. Always will. My mom, independent and most amazing woman wanted me to study business and economics. You know, her business and stuff. Chelsea made it very clear since the beginning that she will never do business or anything like that which left me. I know I don't want to do business like ever. I am very much interested in something related football but my mom won't like that idea. So, I am just trying both.. For her sake. " He looks thoughtfull, like he wants to say more but chooses to shut up.

" So, you chose economics and business studies for your mom Hailey? " Even though I know the answer, I just wanna confirm. I never took Gavin as a guy like that but I know that he loves his mother more than anything. This kinda reminds me of my case, my dad- I don't feel comfortable suddenly. Crap. Shouldn't have thought about it.

" I'll be right back. " I quickly say to Gavin and leave the booth. He doesn't say anything back and I don't look back.. At anything. I just keep moving on. Keep moving on. Keep moving on. Keep moving on. Suddenly those three words get stuck in my head and I..

Splash. Splash. Splash. Splash.
I take a deep breath. My bag, my bag. I need it. I need it right now. I open the bathroom door and quietly go outside. I need my bag. It is in my booth. The booth. I move closer to the booth and see it's empty. Just the stuff. Gavin might have left but then I see his laptop and his stuff. I quickly take out my bag. My small travel bag, I always keep with me.. Just in case. I knew I'll need it. I open the bag and look at the khaki colour small bag. I promised myself that it will never happen. I'll never need it but I can't escape it. I can't control myself. I can't fucking move on! It's like I never will. Before thinking too much, I open the khaki bag and look at the 3 pills. I should not do it. Not again. I am here, living my dream life. I just-

" Excuse me, mam. Do you need anything else? " The waiter's voice separates me from my thoughts and somehow the khaki bag in my hand falls on the floor. I turn quickly, towards the waiter. 

"Uh.. No, I don't need anything. Do you know where is the guy who was sitting here earlier? " 

" Oh.. I saw him walking outside. " He points toward the main door. I nod and take a deep breathe. 

" We are actually leaving.. Umm.. Just give me a minute to pack the stuff, you know. " I point my finger towards our mess on the coffee table. The waiter nods and leave the booth. I pick my water bottle and take a big gulp. 

After getting everything done, I leave the cafe with my and Gavin's stuff. The idiot left me alone here. I don't even have my phone with me. After the incident, I need a new phone. I try to erase that memory and head to the library. It's 8 pm right now. I don't want to go to the campus right now. As I enter the library, I already love this place. It's a new small, cozy library. New York has many Libraries, another thing I love about this city. It's takes me half an hour to get a right book, even though I buy 2 books. I'll start reading them today. I like reading more thrillers than any other genre. I got this book- ONE OF US IS LYING. Hope, I'll like the book.