Avery's (terrible) Guide To Have Fun

05 : break in

AT THE END OF THE WESTWOOD STREET, THERE IS A SMALL STORE THAT SELLS SOUVENIRS. Westwood street is the end of the town, after a few kilometres of the busy bypass road, starts a new town. I work at the souvenir shop which also sells tons of vintage gifting items and often the manager lets me take some candies for free for Valerie. Our manager used to be my older sister's teacher when she was in middle school. Once my sister came to the shop to pick me up and for a long while she and Mrs Hunderson treated me like a child. But in the end, she gave me extra free candies so it was all good.

But I have never taken anyone else there and saying that I am nervous to bring Kamil there is a little bit of an understatement. I work a day shift alone. The shop is small like a shoebox but it is pretty. Mrs Hunderson lets me play whatever song I want from my phone and someone she tunes in the top to vibe with the Spanish melody of twenty-tens and early twenties. It reminds me of mom and sweet danish butter cookies that I hate with all my blood. It is the butter part that bothers me, but that used to be the only thing I would find in the cabinets when I was a kid. She used to make them, now she just buys them from the fancy stores in the airport. If I close my eyes and concentrate really hard, I could still smell them.

Today, we had lacrosse practice in which I almost broke my knee due to a sloppy freshman player. The game is so soon, and the coach wants us to play with kids for some reason. Coach divides us into two teams with me and Kamil captains, he almost kills me in the field. The keyword is almost because if I let my blood on his hand, the coach will take my position and bless it on his shoulders. I get extra points and invitations to the party because I am the captain of the team, there is no way anyone is taking over me. Elliot ends up on his team which makes it easier for me to play because I know her moves inside out. I have learnt her weaknesses like the back of my hand and there was no way she could score with me playing opposite to her.

Yet she plays as good as Kamil does and the coach promises her to make her second captain instead of Kamil if she works harder. Elliot literally glows with all the dust on her body. I am proud of her, but in the locker room, I jokingly threaten her to not do better than me.

"In your dreams, Avery." She rolled her eyes and buttoned her navy blue shirt, "I will be snatching your position before we finish the junior year."

I return her a toothy grin before she leaves.

The realisation hits me slowly that even though I am in a mixed-gender lacrosse team because my sister did an entire rally for her non-binary friend. We still do not have a gender-neutral changing room because the school says that there are not enough trans students for the committee to "invest" money on. Changing in a girl's bathroom is not even the worst part, the worst part is breathing the same air as Kate Jennings and Libby Archer. Kamil's best friends who would make one of me every chance they get. Almost everyone has left the room because the coach makes me and Kamil store the equipment. In the end, it's either the freshman who desperately tries to get the smell of sweat out of their body or because senior supremacy made them wait in an unfair line.

At this point, I might even run off without my shoes on because Kate and Libby are not going to let me live in peace. They walk around me like fucking eagles and my heartbeat accelerates. Maybe this would not have been the case if they physically bullied me but no, they are clever. Kamil's entire group is smart enough to not touch me because I can run off to the principal at that second. Because I have reported them to the principal in freshman year and they got suspended for one day. A complaint from a Filipino demi boy whose older sister ruined the school's reputation by calling them out on social media will obviously get neglected. I close my eyes and tie my shoelaces. God, fuck I cannot even talk to Elliot about this, because she has never been supportive. She likes Kate and Libby as friends, as they hang out during every party and school event.