I freeze up and so does Sorin, his body tenses under mine as I stand up from my straddling position. "Sorin, I'm sorry. I don't know if I actually love you..." I look down at my fingers and begin twirling my thumbs around one another. "Well, I think I do. You don't need to tell me you love me back-" Sorin stands up from our bed, not looking me in my emerald eyes.
"I'm going for a walk," He mumbles as he moves over to the door, his delicate hands clutching the golden handle. For a brief period, he turns back to face me, and I can feel my heart hammering in my chest. "Nita, you don't love me. It won't turn out well, and I can't bear hurting you." My heart breaks when the door slams shut behind him. Tears well up in my eyes and run down my cheeks.
Because I can't keep my Goddamn mouth closed, I've messed it up. I want to run up to him and wrap my arms around him, but I can't and won't because he needs room to decide what he wants and needs. I frantically run my hands through my hair, hurriedly wiping the stray tears from my cheeks with the sleeves of my sweatshirt.
A faint knock comes at the door, which I recognise as Karina's knock patten. She wipes the stray tears away with her thumb and pulls me into an embrace. Despite the fact that she is two years younger than me, she towers over me. "My brother isn't the nicest person in the world, and he isn't the person you believe he is. He's amazing to you and his family since he loves both of us."
She pulls away brushing a strand of hair behind my ear "As his sister I'm compelled to say you're perfect for one another and he's an amazing man. But as your friend I need to tell you what you're not perfect for each other, you're in different places. But he cares deeply for you and I know you feel the same way, you have to make it work not just for you but you're baby as well."
Mine and Karina's heads jerk towards the door as we realise Sarah has been standing at the door the entire time, listening to everything we've said; her rage is visible in the vein that pops out of her forehead. "Nita, I'll talk to you later today. But I need you to inform me of Sorin's whereabouts." When she asks, I sniffle twice and wipe my nose with my sleeves. "He said he needed to go for a stroll," I said.
"Okay," Sarah sighs, a faint smile on her face, despite the fact that the vein across her forehead is showing otherwise. "I understand you're upset; we'll talk about your pregnancy later." As I sit on the edge of my and Sorin's beds, she slams the door behind her.
Before I put my head in my hands, Karina gives me a warm smile. "I'm going on a study date, but message me if you need anything, okay?" As Karina exits the room, I respond with a nod, my head hitting the pillow behind me.
My ribcage is being thrashed out by my heart in an unreasonable manner. In less than an hour, I expressed my love to the man I care about the most, he left without saying anything back, I cried on a seventeen-year-old's shoulder and his mother found out about me having his baby.
As more tears streamed down my painted red cheeks, I brushed my hands over my silky curls, feeling extremely overwhelmed.
I send Sorin message after message, then leave him a voicemail that says, "Sorin, everyone is worried about you, but I'm not sure why. Why can't you just go on a walk without people freaking out? Anyway, please send a quick message to your mother, sister, or brothers to let us know you're fine. If you're reconsidering what's going on between us, please let me know; we can simply be friends if that's all you need. Sorin, please respond. Bye."
However, he has yet to answer, and it has been two hours since he departed. I shouldn't be so worried right now; it's only been two hours, but surely he'd respond...wouldn't he? He would almost certainly respond to his Mother, and I can't help but think that something is seriously wrong.
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A silk robe wraps around my body as I emerge from the shower, showcasing the little swelling from my pregnancy. Condensation from the shower water is all over my body, with beads of water pouring down my back and chest.
It's currently 4am in the morning, I'm showering because it's been 10 hours since I've seen or heard from Sorin and I need to take my mind off it. He's missing and it's all because I couldn't keep my mouth shut for one moment, because I got so caught up in the morning my brain wasn't working sharply.
I wrap the towel around my hair's ends to prevent any more water from dripping down my back. I unlock my closet and pull out a black leather jacket and a black dress.
I quickly change into the dress, my exposed skin standing out against the winter weather, though it's only partly chilly outdoors. The question persists in my mind: why would Karina tell me Sorin isn't as good as I believe? It persisted in my mind for the rest of the sleepless night.
Nita reach inside Sorin's brain, if he had to be somewhere where would he be? Then it dawns on me that he prefers small, remote locations and that he wanted to go for a walk to collect his thoughts.
He had to be at the location he showed me on our first day of school, right? For the first time in ten hours, I leave my room with a hair tie wrapped around my wrist, tying my dark blonde hair into a horrendous pony tail.
I look over to Karina, who has a mug of tea held against her lips and bloodshot eyes like mine, indicating she hadn't gotten any sleep the night before.
"Did he sneak into your bed last night or is he still missing?" Her voice is weak and thin, and occasionally wobbles while she speaks. A scenario I would have loved to experience last night.
"I believe I've figured out where he is. Is it okay if I borrow your motorcycle, I'll return it in perfect condition? I'll send you a message as soon as I arrive." Her white mug lands on the counter with a single arched eyebrow in response.
"You can bring my motorcycle back in the worst condition ever, you don't even have to bring it back. As long as my brother is safe when he gets home." As Karina hands over her helmet, I slowly nod.
Should I have told her I've never once driven a motorbike?
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Author's Note
Thank you for reading this chapter, please vote if you enjoyed.
Mwah
