Monopoly | Norenmin

The Goods and The Bads

Renjun bit his lip as Jeno ran his hand through his hair, gripping it slightly as he ranted. "The fucking eight legged piece of shit keeps going back into the drain and its stressing me the fuck out."
With a snort, Renjun replied "why" before taking a sip of his coffee.
"Cause like," Jeno huffed, tossing out his empty cup as they passed by a trash can, "if I spray it, it'll come out of the bathtub and I don't wanna deal with that."
Renjun sighed, shutting his eyes in despair. "...you and your problems."
"It is a problem!" Jeno exclaimed, looking back at Renjun with wide eyes. Renjun burst into light laughter, shaking his head as he took another sip.

Jaemin was missing in action again for their break as per usual so Renjun took the wonderful liberty of keeping a Jeno company. He could still feel the guilt sort of welling in his stomach, but after his talk with Jaemin it was now a mixed uncomfy feeling that he couldn't quite put his finger on.

"You think it's a red back?" Jeno looked back at him with concerned puppy dog eyes.
Renjun rolled his eyes. "We don't get those here, dumbass."
Jeno clicked his tongue. "You don't know that." He wagged his finger at the elder before pointing at him. He snapped his fingers. "Mark exists. He could've taken one over."
"...Mark's from Canada, dipshit."
"...and?"

Renjun groaned, Jeno breaking into a teasing grin and sticking his tongue out at him. Renjun shook his head with soft laughter, gently pushing the younger boy away. "Absolute prat."
"You love me anyway," Jeno bumped his shoulder. Renjun chuckled, gulping down the dumb voice in his head that told him to shout that he did in so many ways. "And also find you irritating, I agree."
Jeno pouted, headbutting Renjun's shoulder before lazily walking their engraved path.

They had been walking the same path for months now, Renjun watching the seasons change til they finally fit his own icy heart. As the seasons passed Jeno had gotten gloomier though, mirroring the season's depressive change himself, hence why he had spoken with Jaemin a while ago. The feelings had changed as the months had gone by, and even though it had been half a year, watching the summer turn to autumn, he really wished he could go back to summer. Stop it before it started and not fall further for the eyes before him, and just live with a sour taste forever burning his mouth. Because that old faded feeling was so much better than the stacking weights building lopsidedly on his heart. He was a little tired of having to wake up every morning and convincing himself that it was alright.

Renjun could only go with the flow at this point. Blindly following Jaemin and trusting that his heart was in the right place. He knew Jaemin's heart was in the right place, but where the fuck his head was he had no idea.

It was weird. He knew that Jaemin's heart was in the right place. He knew Jaemin well enough now to know that as a fact. A person he had grown to despise was slowly reading the script backwards this time, returning to the feeling it what once was. Though if Renjun really wanted to confront it was an entirely different issue.

Renjun's eyes flickered to the person beside him, Jeno looking down as his feet drew shapes in the layer of frost on the sidewalk as they walked. Renjun smiled softly to himself as he admired the boy's side profile, his sharp features reflecting the light giving him an ethereal angelic look, its glow softening around his nose and eyelashes. He never got tired of staring at such a beautiful person, subconsciously fighting back a smile as he looked at him.
Jeno glanced down at him, catching the boy's pink cheeks, which he was fully prepared to argue about. It was cold in his defence. Instead, Jeno simply gave him a warm smile, Renjun letting a small internal sigh in relief.

Jeno chuckled, taking Renjun's hand into his own. He swung them between them, exhaling into a content smile. "Life is good, Jun."
Renjun laughed, nodding.

There it was again. The pitiful feeling.

It was starting to eat at him more and more as time passed. Even after Jaemin had asked him to keep going, he couldn't help but feel just a little bit bad. Bit by bit the feeling was chewing through his skin, in through his chest, slowly reaching his heart. If he could, he'd pull it out.

He took a deep breath, glancing at Jeno before daring to just ask what was fighting itself to the front of his brain.
"How are you and Jaemin?"
Jeno sighed, nodding with a faltered smile. "I think he's alright."
Renjun furrowed his brows. "You think?"
Jeno shrugged, noticeably tightening the grip on Renjun's hand slightly. "I dunno. Honestly I was surprised he stayed with us a few days ago. A lot of the time he just goes off. He has work though, at two different places now, so I don't blame him."

Renjun bit his lip, making them stop in their tracks. Jeno halted, looking back at him. He guessed he wasn't meant to show as much distress as he was. "You don't blame him, but you seem bothered," Renjun spoke softly.
Jeno's eyes flickered down for a moment as he shrugged. "I guess I'm just not used to him not being there always." He glanced back up, shrugging away his feelings again, like he was trying to get some bug off that just wouldn't stop biting. He gulped a little before breaking into a smile. "There are goods with the bads though," he nodded, tugging Renjun's arm slightly so they'd walk again, "I have less Jaemin, but I still have more of you. That's pretty fucking alright if you ask me."

Renjun chuckled a bit, nodding as he swallowed down icky feelings for the five hundredth time that day. Jeno swayed from side to side with a laugh. "In an ideal world, I'd have both of you with me, and you both are friends as well." Jeno snorted before looking back at Renjun with a grin. "That wouldn't happen though."
Renjun furrowed his brows at Jeno's wording but agreed nevertheless. In an ideal world, things would feel different and Renjun wouldn't be bearing such bullshit, yet here they were.
"I won't force you anymore to get along with Jaemin," Jeno nodded with certainty, "you seem to be on decent enough terms now where you don't look like you're about to break his neck every time you see him."
Renjun nodded, laughing along with Jeno as the feeling creeped its awkward way right through his heart.