It's Renjun's ninth month. Already drawing close to a year, but nothing improved.
Maybe a little, when he started talking to an equally quiet boy one day and spent the weekend with him.
Dream and Zen had special trainings, and so Renjun is alone again most of the time.
I mean, he always is.
Renjun dreaded the days until Friday ended and the weekend started. That time, he will wake up more giddy and excited to spend it solely with his friends.
But it was the third week, and they never came.
Do they have any bad bruises or injuries that they can't let me see? Renjun would just think like that.
After all, he clearly said that he doesn't want to see them with the traces of their deadly missions.
"Monthly checkup!", Rayeon hollered when she entered the boy's ward for the second time. "Here, I got you garlic bread and milk; you should eat up first before the check-up."
"Can I postpone it for tomorrow?"
"Nope, today's your schedule, baby. I promise I'll bring some sweets after so you won't frown the whole day."
"But it would be just the same as the previous months!", Renjun whined. "Doctor Ahn would just ask me the same ten questions and give me a special hypnosis that didn't work a single bit!"
"But you said you did see yourself in that specific setting one time?"
"It was one time, and...", he momentarily paused and hung his head low. "It was scary, and I don't want to visit that memory again, so I strengthened my guard so I wouldn't see it again."
"Renjun"
The said male just looked away as tears brimmed in his eyes, aware that he had somewhat disappointed the girl and believed that she was mad.
But would they understand him a little? It's such a horrific memory that even a little vision of it would make him go crazy.
Renjun still can't handle the pressure and the weight of the truth.
Sure, he can't remember anything—his mind could've shut down at that moment.
But what if it's true? What if he killed Chenle? With his own hands?
Renjun is confused too; she can't believe the fact. Because why would he kill Chenle in the first place?
"Renjun!"
"Ah shit!"
"Oh my god, I'm sorry!", Rayeon launched her body on the male for a tight hug, an unintentional reflex as she thought he would have a panic attack because she surprised him.
"I'm fine, all good", Renjun mumbled, but he too couldn't let go of the girl's waist.
She's just so warm. and this feeling is sh*t.I'm getting sick.
"Sorry, really. It's just that you look so deep into your thoughts, and I know how this tricky mind works. I'm afraid I lost you for a moment."
He lightly chuckled. "You didn't. You won't lose me that easily."
Of course I wouldn't. I would kill myself if I did Huang Renjun—scratch that. Mark will kill me himself.
✲꘏ ꘏ ꘏ ꘏ ꘏ ꘏✲
"How are you feeling these past few months, Renjun?"
"I'm fine", Renjun timidly answered like a programmed robot.
Doctor Ahn just flickered at the fellow doctor seated at the far seat, throwing a quizzical look.
"He's doing really fine, Doc; I've been with him most times for the whole month, and I took care of him full time because the interns took the other three patients from my stead."
"That's good. How about your sleeping schedule, Renjun? Still dusk to dawn?"
Renjun pouted, "I can't seem to get rid of it."
"Don't worry, you will pass it once that heavy weight is pulled out of you. Though we could only guarantee that if you'll let yourself walk into the same memory again, Renjun,"
Rayeon was alerted when she saw Renjun's hands trembling.
"Don't worry, you're safe here. No one will touch you or hurt you—it's just us three. I'll wake you up if it's too heavy for you, okay?"
"Doc, I think Renjun's still not ready."
"Okay"
Surprised, Rayeon quickly walked over to him and rested her hand atop his shaking ones.
Renjun just took a deep sigh and squeezed her hand, saying that it'll be okay—he will be okay.
Because he will, right?
He can't stay in this life forever; he can't run away forever.
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
