TEMPTRESS

XXIV.

ANGÈLE JOSÉPHINE MONET LAURENT CHASTIN - TOULOUSE, FRANCE 1968

"Can we talk about yesterday in the bath?" She asked, sitting up and stared down at Julien who opened his eyes and did the same.

"I told you it's fine." He repeated, running his hair through his hair, removing any bits of grass with Angele helping him.

"I know but... I thought, I don't know... I thought you were better..." She pressed her lips together. "Maybe better isn't the right word to use." She nervously plucked the fresh green grass underneath her.

"Do we really have to talk about this?" He frowned slightly and buried his face in his hands, letting out a grunt.

She carefully pulled his hands away from his face, intertwining them with hers. "Julien, you know I try to be as honest as possible, but I can tell when something isn't right with you. I'm just worried. I know I made a mistake but it's also important for us to talk about it. And I know you never told me the whole story and I understand. I really do but there's something you're not telling me and it's frustrating... Sexually." She whispered the last part. "Can't I help you forget?"

"Putain." He groaned, leaning back.

"It's because of what happened. Right? When you were younger?"

"And why don't we talk about you fatherly issues? We never discussed that? Your relationship with him?" He snapped.

She retracted his hands from him. "Julien, that's not fair. You can't do that." She tried to keep her composure in front of him. He watched as her shoulders slumped slightly, but he knew she was trying to keep it together.

"I'm sorry but what do you want me to say? And as much as I love sex I can't feel comfortable when being touched like that because it just takes me back to a time that I don't want to remember? I'm a man. What will people think? My father molested me? I'm so faggot because of that? Because my father is some pervert?" He had no idea what he had just let slip. He just wanted the conversation to end quickly. This was something they never talked about, but what triggered him to act like that in the first place when it seemed like he had moved on within the past few years of their relationship. They never liked discussing this conversation and Julien had only vaguely talked about it. Enough for Angele to piece things together herself without asking to much.

"Ton père?" She gasped. That was something she didn't know. She knew Julien had a tough childhood and his resentment towards his father, but she had the same problems too. She always thought the person who had done something so awful to him was his housekeeper or a nanny but not someone like his father.

"Angele, don't do this to me please." He whispered.

At this point, she wanted to cry. She stared at Julien who was lost in thought, not willing to look at her. "Je suis désolée." She told him.

"You don't have to be sorry. You didn't do anything." He grabbed a hold of her hand, dragging her towards him. He let her rest her head on his chest, listening to his heartbeat.