You fixed my broken heart

The end or so I thought

I woke up Waverly was in my hands again could it all had been a dream, a very scary dream. I moved my arms to see I was completely naked, did we have sex, no surly not I told her no she wouldn't do it to me anyways right?

"Mmm morning hunny" she stretched kissing my lips that didn't do much to kiss back. She looked at me strange getting off me "Nicole are you okay" I looked at her, was I still high "did we have sex" she laughed at me and got out of bed where I saw her beautiful naked body which of course made me very hard but I didn't think about it much

"No Nicole we didn't have sex. Don't you remember?" I shook my head and got ready for her to tell me. She sat on the bed and her eyes become a bit watery

"You didn't go sleep last night and when you got up I felt it but thought you was only going to the toilet but then I heard the door go so I got out of bed and followed you. We walked for a long time until we got to the bridge, you took your pill and sat on the edge of the bridge where I came and sat with you" She was holding in her tears but that's not what I remember I thought I was alone

"We spoke about what was up and all you said was I couldn't help and what it would feel like to die, it would make you happy finally. You kept asking questions like if your body would panic if you tired to drown yourself. I tried talking to you again but you just got up and left, I thought I had said something but you only went to the bottom of the bridge where you repeatedly said things about killing yourself and how it would make you happy, like you was in a trans well that was until you got into the ice cold water and said it didn't bother you but your body went into shock" she came and cuddled up to me wiping her face

"You put your whole body into the water I jumped in and grabbed you, you said that you felt happy your body was in peace, then a car stopped at the bridge and you grabbed your stuff and ran to the top where a girl stood. She was so pretty just your type and you walked up to her and kissed her.. you spoke and went to kiss her again but pushed her away and said my name, she gave you a strange look and you kissed again, I didn't say anything I felt like she was something to you. When she looked at me she got into her car and you followed her, some time passed and you screamed my name jumping out her car and running to me, I held you in my arms and the last thing you said was she wasn't me then you passed out and we both brought you back here" she didn't look at me like she was broken and it was all my fault

"Baby I am so sorry if I.. I wasn't going to kill myself it's just that's not how I remember it at all. You wasn't there just Shae and I told her I love her Waverly I don't I swear she was my girlfriend in the UK but we moved and I met you.. your perfect waves the only person I want and will ever" I tried to kiss her but she moved away "so your naked because when we got home we was going to have sex but you couldn't get hard because of Shae" she said her name with anger in her tone

I grabbed her head and again tried to kiss her but failed "I'm sorry Waverly I really am you are the only person I want ever.. I want to be with you for the rest of my life and if that means I can't even think about Shae again I'm down because I only want you" I got off the bed and grabbed a towel and my bag "I'm gonna get in the bath. I love you Waverly more then anything in this world.. I'm sorry baby for everything I love you and will till my last breath"

I got into the bath and got my blade out I wasn't naked still had shorts and a bra on but I had broken Waverly's heart, the only person I love and will ever love I hurt so there really is no reason for my being

I cut my neck deeper then I thought I was going to. The feeling of not being able to breath felt amazing, I put my head under water and slowly let myself go down my eyes closed and my body shut down bit by bit. Everything went white and I saw Waverly and heard her, she was screaming my name in terror I felt her hands on my skin again god did I miss her touch "NICOLE PLEASE FOR FUCK SAKE WHY DID YOU DO THIS I FORGIVE YOU IM SORRY I KNOW IT WAS A MISTAKE I WAS JUST PISSED PLEASE YOU HAVE TO WAKE UP PLEASE NICOLE I LOVE YOU OKAY I LOVE YOU I WANT TO MARRY YOU PLEASE NICOLE I CANT LIVE WITHOUT YOU IN MY LIFE"