Paradise

Chapter Seventeen

It was pouring rain by the time my mother got in. I knew the idea was out of the question, so I didn't even bother asking. Instead, I helped my mother bring in the small amount of groceries she'd picked up on her way home. The sad thing was, she'd been nearly an hour late. I probably could have made it to Ms. Albert's and back without her ever knowing.

It mattered little now, though; it was already getting dark.

I slumped into one of the kitchen chairs with a sigh, dropping a handful of bags on top of the table, and looked down at the angry red imprints across my hands where the plastic had dug into my skin.

"You know you don't have to try to carry everything in all at once," my mother said, going through the bags, and putting the items away.

"I don't like making more than one trip," I said, ripping open a box of soda and pulling a can out. Instantly the cans rushed toward the new entry, banging against one another, and nearly crashing to the floor had I not blocked their path with my hand.

"Oh, Penny!" My mother gave me a disapproving look. "You didn't open it right. Now they're all going to come spilling out!"

"I'll fix it," I said timidly, setting my can to the side, and pulling out the rest. One by one, I set them in the fridge. I heard my mother sigh behind me and said, "What?"

"Nothing," she said. "Just had a hard day. I'm tired. Still gotta make something for dinner, though." She sighed again.

"I'm sorry."

"It's fine," she said, "I'm used to it." Then she gave a passive-aggressive laugh that made me feel bad.

"I can help," I volunteered. "With dinner, I mean. I can help you--"

"Nah, I know you don't like cooking," she said.

"So. Doesn't mean I can't still help."

"You should focus on doing your homework," she said. "You do have homework tonight, don't you?"

"Yeah."

"Why don't you go get it out of the way? So you don't have to worry about it later," she said. I knew it wasn't a suggestion. It was her way of asking me to leave her alone. She needed a quick breather before my father got in and demanded all of her attention with his absurd barrage of questions like, "did you do any laundry? I can't find any socks." and "when's dinner ready? I'm starving." Then there were the times when he came home on edge and argumentative. I never knew what caused these kinds of outbursts. I only knew it was best to keep my mouth shut and stay away from him when he was in that sort of mood. For all I knew, he'd had pint up stress from work and needed to blow a fuse or two at someone safe, like my mother who couldn't fire him for yelling at her.

"Okay," I said, taking my soda and going to my room. I shut the door behind me and locked it.

My first impulse was to watch some TV or play a video game, but neither of those things sounded especially appealing. In the end, I did exactly as my mother advised, and had my homework finished by the time she called me for dinner. After dinner I decided to call Kendall. I tried four times, but she never picked up. Figuring her parents had probably taken her out for dinner, I decided to take a long, hot shower and call it a night. I was in bed by 8:00pm.

That night I dreamed Robert asked me to the Autumn formal.

Brown and gold reefs hung above the doors, inspiring a festive mood before the music even reached my ear.

Robert looked stylish in a classic black and white tux. It went wonderfully with the flowing white gown I wore. My long hair was tossed in an up-do that looked casual, but had probably taken ages to perfect.