Marvel Characters Watch Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D (DISCONTINUED)

FZZT Part 1

INT: Bus lab.

Ward goes through the motions of prepping and holding up the night-night gun.

Fitz watches. Ward sets it back down.

Hunter: Not this wanker (seething, first clenching)

Bobbi: Hunter calm down

Yelena: Oh look more people don't like him either (smirks at Natasha)

Clint: Why is he so unliked?

Natasha: Last i worked with him he was pretty good

Bobbi (deadpans): Never got along it's a long story

Steve: you seem to have a lot of those

WARD: Sorry, Fitz. It's close, but it's just not right.

FITZ: Really? 'Cause agent Coulson had no problems.

WARD: It's an ounce too heavy.

Groot: I am groot

Thor: Yes tree is right 

everyone looks at Thor confused

Rhodey: You understood what he said?

Thor: Why yes it is one of the many languages they teach on asgard

Skye, who is also in the lab, and is busy with some computers, looks up at Ward.

SKYE: An ounce? Seriously?

Bobbi: Daisy looks so young

Thor: That is Lady Skye

Bobbi's eyes widen in realisation

Hunter cuts in: She changes her name to Daisy later on. That is what we know her by

Clint: First Mary-sue, then Skye then Daisy what is next?

Fury, Hill, Bobbi and Hunter all just look at each other

Fitz picks up the gun to test the weight.

WARD: It's the difference between success and failure. When you're on a rooftop with a 15-mile-an-hour wind, your target is 500 yards away—

FITZ: Yeah, but we do have a rifle.

Ward gives him a look

WARD: Lose the ounce.

FITZ: Yeah, okay. On it.

Ward walks out.

FITZ [mockingly]: "Lose the ounce."

Drax: HAHAHAHA

Fitz takes up the night-night gun and does a bit of a cowboy swagger.

FITZ [ as Ward, with an over-the-top Western-movie-type American accent ]: I'm Agent Grant Ward, and I can shoot the legs off a flea from 500 yards, as long as it's not windy.

[ Skye laughs ]

Fitz looks over at her and smiles, big and bright.

[ Fitz laughs ] and sets the night-night gun back down.

FITZ [ back to being a Scot ]: Hey. That's a sound I haven't heard in a bit.

SKYE: Yeah, well, you wouldn't be laughing a whole lot if you were living in Ward's doghouse

Tony: the doghouse is not a place one wants to be

Rhodey: and you would know huh tones

Tony: Shut it platypus