4:1
WITCHES 1, 2, 3: Heehoo, funny potion.
(The potion is actually soup. Tomato basil, to be precise. Knock from within.)
WITCH 1: Oh hey, someone's knocking, get the door, dude.
(Enter Macbeth.)
MACBETH: You guys do the prophecy stuff, right? Got any good news for me?
WITCH 2: Well, uh, these ghosts I know could help.
MACBETH: Niceeee.
(enter Ghosts 1, 2 and 3.)
MACBETH: Okay, now elaborate. What-
WITCH 3: No, shut up, It knows.
GHOST 1: Macduff is gonna thrash your ass my guy.
MACBETH: Oh damn.
GHOST 2: Don't worry fam, none of woman born can kick you off the server.
MACBETH: Sounds weird but ok.
GHOST 3: You know that tree in your backyard? You won't be purged until it comes inside.
MACBETH, doing his best Shrek impression (it's very bad): Like that's ever gonna happen. Oh and! Are Banquo's kids or whatever gonna be discord mods?
WITCH 3: Yep. All of 'em, too.
MACBETH: Dammit-
(Exit Witches. Enter Lennox, my beloved lil boy.)
LENNOX: You good, dude?
MACBETH: Yeah, what's up?
LENNOX: Well, uh, Macduff went to Duncan's place.
MACBETH: Oh, okay. (he gestures for Lennox to leave. He doesn't.)
LENNOX: Can,,, can i have some of your garlic bread? <:)
MACBETH: ...Fine. (Exit Lennox, with garlic bread.) Oh my gosh, I have the perfect way to get back at Duff before he kicks my ass. Ohoho, kidnapping time!!
(Exit Macbeth.)
4:2
(Read this like an airport radio announcement.)
This would have been the scene in which Macduff's wife and son would've died. Said son is 6 months old in this AU. I've called him Martin because it's the first thing I thought of and also I refuse to call him 'Duff Jr'. But yeah, that's Duff's biological son! In all technicalities, the guy could beat Macbeth! But that's irrelevant, because he doesn't. Lady Macduff is nonexistent, unfortunately. I'm sorry if you appreciated her. It's kind of out of spite though – Lennox was erased in my sister's Macbeth school play and I was upset about it. (Feel free to ask me about that school play, I saw it twice and it was really good.)
Anyways! I don't want to normalise child murder (for obvious reasons), so instead Macbeth straight up steals the baby. Ross was supposed to be babysitting him, so they're gonna be very screwed. Don't worry, Martin-Duff-Jr is very safe. :)
That's just a bit of context for you. Toodles!
- |<>| -
Please ask me about Macbeth the musical I want to talk about it /lh
Anyways, I hope you enjoyed this lil treat :)
Act 4 Scene 3 will be a separate chapter with legitimate sentences, so look forward to that I guess-
ALSO ABOUT BANQUO'S KIDS
They're not real kids - Banquo just 'adopts' people on Discord because of his Mom Friend Energy™.
So he has lots of Discord children (and Fleance).
That's all, have a great day guys :D
- Kris
YOU ARE READING
mcdeath™
Humori basically made umm a rewrite of macbeth! it's a modern au, everyone has discord, and everyone's gay. (i also have it on ao3!!) this is meant to be lighthearted and funny, as you can see by the cover ^^
