A Guide To Vigilante-ism By Tommyinnit (edited)

5- how to meet your best friend, fight crime, and get kidnapped

Tommy watches as Ranboo rolls over in bed again.

He's weird when he sleeps. He keeps talking in his sleep.

Speaking of,

"Theseus.."

Tommy winces and shakes him awake.

Ranboo sits up.

"Hi." He says.

"Morning, big man. You were deadnaming me in your sleep."

Ranboo frowns, "Sorry. Um.." He pulls his phone out, "It's almost time to open the cafe."

Tommy nods and stands up.

He stretches and yawns, turning back to Ranboo.

"I'm gonna go find Tubs, can you start setting everything up?" He asks.

Ranboo nods. "I just have to get dressed."

Tommy yawns again, scratching at his neck. "Alright, see you in a bit!"

He walks out of the room.

Tubbo is sitting at the kitchen counter, bent over and working on something.

Weird, Tubbo is never up this early.

Tommy walks over.

"Whatcha doing Tubs?"

Tubbo looks up, grinning with his hair pulled out of his eyes. The nuclear waste symbols that replace his pupils seem a little more intimidating.

He beckons Tommy over.

"I've been learning about some new types of explosives.."

Tommy doesn't know if he should be excited or concerned.

Tubbo gestures to the counter, "They're mini nukes that can fly, and they're shaped like bees!"

They are indeed mini nukes shaped like bees. They have metal wings attached, with nuclear waste symbols sloppily painted on the tops.

Tommy nods, "Right. Um. It's almost time to open the cafe, please put the nukes away."

Tubbo stands up, "Alright bossman!"

The two head downstairs together, where Ranboo is already setting everything up.

~~~~~~

Tubbo looks into to the fridge, "We are out of eggs!" He anounces, turning to the other two.

"Tommy. Go get more eggs."

Tommy groans, "Why meee?" He asks, going limp against Tubbo.

"Because I said so. Go."

Tommy stands up fully, "Finee." He sighs, grabbing his wallet.

"Do we need anything else at the store?"

Tubbo hums, "Nope. Just eggs."

Tommy nods, "I am leaving now, I am going to get the milk. Don't look for me."

Ranboo nods absently, "Don't forget the eggs."

Tommy walks out of the front door, walking quickly towards the store.

Today is a pretty good day for him!

Ranboo didn't even wake them up at 2 AM and Tubbo is in a good mood!

They haven't had any villains or vigilantes come in while they're halfway dead, nothing could stop him today.

He's almost at the store, he takes a shortcut down an alley. He sees a raccoon, he stops to pet it.