Aga's POV
My bruised heart. Maltreated badly.
Why the hell is this happening?
I feel distressed. I'm not happy. Well, I should be because finally Lea, my bestfriend who turned out to be the "LOVE OF MY LIFE" is loved by his dreamboy. What I mean is that I already know how prudent and thoughtful and wistful Lea is when it comes to her feelings for Bamboo. I should celebrate kasi wala nang mangungulit sakin about how'd she'll manage to move on and etc. But I did not feel anything I am supposed to feel. Instead of bliss and ecstasy, I feel reckless and incompetent. Kung tutuusin, wala dapat akong ma-feel na gan'to. Kasi lahat pagpaanggap lang. Pero hindi. My feeling for her breeded. It's propagated and is ripen.
Tears started rolling down my cheek. Para akong nababakla neto. Haha. Bitter laughter. First time kong umiyak sa babae. Kay Lea pa. Langya naman to o. Everybody na nakakakilala sa 'kin will describe me as bull-hearted, impulsive hard-type person. My features fits me exquisitely. Maybe it defined myself as what is visible and noticeable on their senses. I mean, they see me doing simple arguments with the media. Saying offensive jokes and doing sarcasms. I'm maybe masterful and proffesional. But I'm not as outsmart as what people see me the way they do. I cry when it comes to Mommy matters. Haha. Look. I'm not numb, I can feel according to 'what to feel'. I'm not as hard as what others are saying. Purely hypothesis and presumptions. Everyone don't know me the way Lea do. She knows me well. Sa kanya lang ako nagkakaroon ng totoong away. She's my everything. I have to affirm. I do have my pride. But I do a lil' adjustment when it comes to her. When it comes to Lea. And now, she's making me cry. I'm too affected.
BAMBOO KISSING HIS NON SHOWBIZ GIRLFRIEND.
Girlfriend huh? The heck.
I'm badly hurt. It's because I can't help myself from crying kahit na predictable na ang mga mangyayari. Kagaya 'nung last conversation kay Bamboo. 'Nung sinabi niyang aagawin niya si Lea. I know he meant it. It hurts me. Kasi naman in the first place, I already know what my place is. BESTFRIEND. 'Di na hihigit 'dun. I insisted helping Lea to move on. Kaya ngayon, heto ako nagdurugo ang puso. Kung sakaling iwanan ka niya, may nagmamahal sa'yo. Andito ako. (BLKM ang peg. Lol. Ft. Ariel Rivera and Lea Salonga)
I composed myself. Kung ganito lang ako. Mamatay ako. Sasabog puso ko. I need to talk to her.
Calling Lea...
"Lei?"
No response.
"I need to talk to you.", I heard her gasps from the line.
Still no response.
"Okay, okay. I knoe you're listening. I'll go to yourhouse later. By 1 in the afternoon."
No response.
Call ended.
"I missed you and I love you.", I said over the phone. I don't have the guts na sabihin 'to sakanya. Pero ngayon, I'll tell her what I truly feel. God, help me out.
