Desperate Desire

7. Stay

Jade POV

I had been woken from a very pleasant slumber by phone ringing, grudgingly I had removed myself from my spot in Roman's arms, the feeling of his warm, soft skin against my face had been so nice I didn't want to move. But since it had been Trevor calling I'd had no choice.

I had slipped out on to the balcony and chatted with him for a bit and the whole time I didn't feel any guilt, I couldn't ignore te fact that no matter how wrong this was being with Roman made me happy, just like being with Trevor made me happy.

I now found myself sitting in a chair in the corner of the room, my chin resting on my knees, looking over at the bed where the man in question slept. He was laid on his front, his hair over his face and the bed sheet is barely covering his ass.

I know of course that he isn't really mine, he never can be becuase I'm not free to be his. I also know that this has to end, after Hawaii I'll go home and this will be over. I haven't told Roman becuase I don't want to hurt him, it will be easier for him if I'm just suddenly gone.

Roman stirs a little and stretches out his arm, he let's out a soft groan when he can't find me before turning on his side, moving his hair out of his face and glancing around the room.

"What are you doing over there babygirl?" He asks in the sexiest morning voice I've ever heard

"Thinking and watching you sleep" I sigh "Trevor called, I didn't want to disturb you"

"Come here" he says holding his arms open "come lay with me"

I get up from my seat and walk over to the bed, I climb in and snuggle into his side as he wraps his strong arms around me. I feel him kiss the top of my head and then let out a gentle sigh

"This is definitely better than the first time" he says "it's nice not waking up alone"

Reaching up I gently move the hair out of the way and take in every detail of his handsome face. If this was the last time I get to be with him I wanted to make the most of it.

"I would have stayed if I could" I say "I didn't want to leave"

"I know babygirl" he says "I wish things were different"

"Tell me Roman would you have wanted me if I wasn't taken?" I ask "or is it the excitement of sneaking around you like?"

"I wanted you the second I laid eyes on you" he says softly "I didn't know then that you were taken, so yes I would have wanted you if you were single, would you have wanted me?"

"Yes without a doubt" I smile "there is no way I wouldn't have wanted you"

"Have you decided what you're doing after Hawaii?" He asks "becuase I'd really like it if you'd stay on the road"

"I haven't yet" I say "I have a lot to think about"

"What ever you decide I will respect your decision" he sighs "even if I can't stand the thought of losing you"

"We're not each others to lose" I say kissing his chest and in one quick movement he rolls me onto my back and leans over me looking deep into my eyes

"Be mine Jade" he says a serious expression on his face "I know I have no right to ask and you don't have to answer now, but at least say you'll think about it"

"Alright I will" I say and he smiles, was I really willing to consider leaving Trevor for this man? Maybe. I still loved Trevor and if I had my way I'd be with them both, for the first time in my life I understood the term wanting to have you cake and eat it too.

I was caught between a rock and a hard place, I don't want hurt either of them but I also didnt want to hurt either of them. It had only been a few days yet I had got ridiculously attached to Roman, everything felt different with him, even the world seemed different when I was around him.

"Where'd you go babygirl?" He asks and I look up to find him smiling down at me

"I was just thinking about stuff" I say "you know you have a beautiful smile"

"Everything about you is beautiful" he says before leaning down and kissing me.

He kisses me slowly, his soft full lips movig gently against mine as my hands find their way into his hair. In this moment he is everything but I know in a few hours I will be back with Trevor and I may never get to kiss Roman again. I had no body to blame but myself for this mess I gotten into and whether I like it or not I needed to make a decision and some one is going to get hurt.