I just want to say... Hi?

Alone

Ok so now my life it shit everyone noes I self harm in stuck with two freaking councilers. ok so it's hard enough to say what's wrong with you to one person but twice just makes me hate myself.

Ok don't be alarmed by that, that's what I was like then if you want to know how I'm doing now you'll just have to keep on reading.

So life's shit and I just cut everyday and it's really hard to stop and well I just feel... Alone. I can't tell anyone about what's happening cus it will make it worse. but I can't say nothing cus I'll be all alone. So I put a big freaking smile on my face and talk about shit that meant nothing. But most the time I was so sick by my second class I would just walk out of school. One week I was only in four classes, I don't know why but I never got told of for that.
So there I was I had my friends who cared so much about me and I felt so alone. It was like I could talk to anyone but I couldn't really talk to anyone.

This was all going on but the thing was it wasn't because of anyone else no one hates me and I wasn't scared of anyone. But there was one person... me. I was scared of myself what I was doing to myself and what I had done. But worse I hated myself for what I've done to other people because I'm not exactly the nices of people, and this kind of explains why. Because I'm always defending myself even from my friends and family and that scares me cus I can loose the people I love.

Then all of a sudden I got to that stage I always told people, I always told myself I would never go that far I guess I got so good at hiding my fear with lies I even convinced myself. Because I've always sayed 'If I can't convince myself how can I convince anyone else?' So ye that was that I really went to far I became... Became well...
Suicidal