ADOPTED BY BILLIE EILISH

8) you're okay love

Kira's pov

The last thing i want is for Billie to notice that I'm in pain. I don't want her to hate me and send me back there. I just want a forever home where I feel safe, which would be with Billie but i don't know yet if she wants to keep me with her.

I mean I bring a lot of drama in this lovely family as soon as they'll notice something's off. They would either give me back to the center or they would be there for me which i couldn't really think of.

Why would they care if a girl like me cuts or starves herself? they just do it to get money don't they? I could be around thousands of people and yet feel so alone.

I'm sitting in my bathroom, door locked, bleeding thighs and tears on my cheeks. It's still morning so it's just a question of time until Billie will wake up. Like i said, i don't want her to really see me like this

Yes she knows that i cut but she probably doesn't know i still do it. And my food? Still throwing it up after ever long day.

Just when I'm cleaning up the mess that i created, a knock appeared on the door, Billie. Oh Oh. I clean up the floor and Billie gets really inpatient so she knocks again. I take a quick look checking if everything's clean and then open the door.

„What took you so long? You weren't flushing so what did you do?" Billie asks me a little stubborn. Her reaction isn't really a surprise to me. She probably knows now that I still do it — will get mad — sends me back. I knew it..

„Hellooo?" billie asks again. „Hmm? Oh ummm nothing" i whisper, scared of her reaction.

~show me your wrist~ billie says

I shrug and show her my wrist where she only finds old cuts, the ones she knows about.

~show me your thighs~ billie says

I hesitate before answering ~i should put off my pants in front of you?? Are you some perv?~ i laughed it off

~kira. if you don't do it, i will. Let me see your thighs~ billie

I look at the floor, ashamed of myself. I take my pants off revealing the fresh cuts I just made.

She looks me dead in the eyes. I can't read her emotions. Is she mad? Is she worried? Is she sad?

She nods, giving me a sign that i can put them on again so i did. She comes up to me and hugs me, something i didn't thought would happen..

I let myself literally fall into her embrace and start sobbing. I don't know why I start crying but I can't control it anymore. I can't control my emotions.

She whispers sweet nothings into my ear and lets me calm down.

~shhh you're okay love, I'm here~

~the end~ oopsies