Savagely Inhibited

five

Warren.

I sat in my office, my eyes set on Ender as he did his work. He didn't even spare me a glance as we sat not too far from one another.

Except I didn't need to look at him or him look at me. I felt like...this was enough. It kind of irritated me because I wanted him to look at me. He had me...one-hundred percent. After yesterday, he was all I wanted at this point.

The very thought of his hands being upon me and his lips kissing me again... To imagine his arms holding me tightly...so tight that our bodies mold together. So that I can feel every part of him.

As I thought of such a thing I saw Ender glance at me now, his eyes heavy on mine. I wasn't sure what that signified as I lift my cheek from my hand. The both of us keeping eye contact still.

His eyes narrow on me for just a second, only to look back forward now.

"Your expression gives away your lewd thoughts," He states to me, and I don't say anything, "You stay silent because you know what I'm saying is true."

"Exactly." I finally speak, and he looks at me fully now. "I shamefully think of what we did in my bedroom together, I can't deny that. It might've not been much to you, but it was a lot for me. How could I act like...that wasn't something?"

Ender's expression became quite unreadable, but I got a sense of heat from it. Despite his running yesterday, I didn't want him to run again. I wanted him to stay with me and to possibly do more than what he did.

I see him snort, looking back down at his work.

Or maybe I'm thinking too much.

"If you want me to fuck you so badly, you could've just asked." He says simply, my eyebrows rising. "Just kidding."

I look away now because at this point he was just trying to mess with me. I couldn't tell with him...what he was really thinking or feeling. It was obvious that he let me see what he wanted me to see, and that was it. There was no 'seeing all of him', this was it.

"Saying that...'fuck' is so lewd. It doesn't even sound like sex, everyone has come to associate it with sex, but why that word?"

"Haven't you ever fucked your wife?" He questions me without shame, my eyes widening.

I stay silent, and that's when I see him stand up now. He went towards me with a few papers, but when he set them down he was right before me.

"Fucked...no, I had sex with her... What do you think 'fucking' is?" I ask him, and he looks at me like I'm stupid. "Like...how do you define it?"

"I define a good fuck as unrelenting, savage, hunger-filled sex that can't be quenched. A fast tempo, heavy breathing, quite sweaty...actually. Can barely utter words, just savage sex." He tells me straight in the face.

His hand lifts off my desk now, and he chuckles at me.

"I know for a fact you've never fucked your wife."

"O-Of course not." I found myself breathless, looking away from him as he chuckles. "It wasn't much of a pleasurable experience. I can't say it wasn't at times...but we just had sex. Felt more like a job for me than just me...having sex."

I look back at him, and his eyes were soft on me. I wasn't sure why until they were back to being hardened. Now I knew what I said was right earlier. About him only showing me what he wants me to see. It wasn't all of him...dare I say, not even the real him?

"Oh poor Warren, have you ever truly had sex then?" He seems to mock me. "And I'm not mocking you when I ask this. This is serious."

"Of course I've had sex. What a stupid question-."