Finding A Reason To Live

Reasons?

For some reason, I'm always getting abused. Whether it be physical, or mental it happens. This is my story leading up to when I'm 16 years old and tried to commit suicide. I want to die so badly, but every time I'm planning it, somebody stops me, but this time I will succeed... I hope.

****Zach's P.O.V.*****

I am Chloe's main abuser. I have hurt her physically and mentality. I do it for pure entertainment, I love seeing the tears fill her eyes, the way she covers the pain in her eyes. But one day I walk into her room to see blood soaking up her shirt, terror runs through me when she looks up and meets my eyes and gurgles "Are you happy now? ." I run to her and haul her over my shoulder to my car. I put her in my car and call the police while speeding to the hospital.

I have my emergancy lights on and an ambulance met me at the community college. They have a gurny ready, I jump out of the car and pick her up and give her to them. I stand there and watch them try to save my god-sisters life. I feel my eyes fill with tears, but I don't cry I won't allow my self to because I did this to her.

**Chloe's P.O.V.**

Standing here in completely darkness was something that I'd never imagined. I wasn't necessarily scared nor was I happy. Just, numb. I didn't know where to go and I don't want to stay here by myself.

"Hello...?" My voice sounded so small and sweet, echoing threw out the darkness.

Nothing happened though, and when I was about to start to get worried, this light appeared and my God was it beautiful. It seemed to have had this pull on me and I happily obligate, walking straight to it and feeling this blanket of warmth surround me.

My hand tentatively reached out, only to be thrown back by and invisible shield that was hell bound on not letting me threw.

***Zach's P.O.V***

"Get her into surgery now! She's going to need a respirator, and a blood transfusion, its going to be a bloody miracle if she lives."

#after surgery #

"For now she's stable, but its too early to find out if there's internal bleeding, she may not make it through the night." The doctor tells me with shakey hands, I glare at him, "what are you keeping from me doctor?'' I ask him with worry laced in my voice. "Well you uh, see if she does survive there is a chance she will never move from her waist down...." He tells me with a shakey voice. "Is that all?" I asked daringly, he shakes his head yes and walks away.

I guess I should tell you why I'm like this to Chloe well you see eight years ago, She was begging and begging for a new pair of shoes because her favorite pair tore. So my mother took her. Right when they were paying this man walked in with a gun and was holding the people in the store hostage. And Chloe was taking deep breathes, because of an anxiety attack, that caused a asthma attack. So my mother threw her hand into her purse for her inhaler and startled the man, so he shot her. He shot her below the shoulder, but above the heart, and hit a main artery. My mother gave Chloe her inhaler, and helped her calm down, all while she was laying there bleeding out. She died eight minutes after. That is why I'm like this to her. I know it wasn't her that killed her but, if she would have just wait until we went into town together, my mom would still be alive.

All while I'm thinking about this memory, this story, my family is on there way here. I get up to find the doctor, to see how she's doing when the elevator door's open and three pissed off looking people come walking out. One I don't recognize and two that I do, Chloe's friends that protect her as much as possible in school, from me and our cousins at school. The other person that I don't know is about 6'2' and has dark brown hair with gray eyes. The only girl there who I'm assuming is her best friend walked up to me and slapped me so hard I heard my jaw pop. I grabbed my face and held it, tears welling up in my eyes, I blink rapidly and look towards her, "I deserved that" I muttered. If possible she gets closer and seethes out "you deserve a lot more than that." and right as she is about to do any more, the un-known guy walks up and pulls her back, looks at me, and glares. He whispers something to her that makes her nod and relax. About to turn around and walk away, the un-known speaks up "Hey you, how's she doing?" I turn and look him straight in the eyes, wishing that I could trade her places right know. "She...may not....um...make it... through the...night." I say with a sob building up in the back of my throat. He gives me a stiff nod, I speak up one last time, realizing the family wasn't coming, "I'm gonna go home and get her some clothes, will you say here and wait for the doctor..?" I look at the girl who slapped me "Oh um.... Charlotte" she mutters. I nod and turn around. I press the down button on the elevator and turn around to see Charlotte hitting unknown guys chest while he holds her.