My Italian Nightmare

Chapter 23: Assumptions

Tuesday, 19th of October 2021

"I don't know Ari, it just doesn't seem like you're cut out to be dating somebody right now." Freyja looked at me as she took a sip from her energy drink and I groaned.
"Please tell me I'm not that bad", I begged her and clasped my hands under my chin.
"Has nothing to do with bad Ari, frankly you just seem to be emotionally unavailable to Stephan right now."
"I do like him", I emphasized but Freyja just smiled feebly and shook her head lightly.
"Ari, you also like cheese and badly written romance novels – you know what I'm saying? Stephan shows genuine interest in you and that flatters you. You need a distraction from that whole Italian circus and hope Stephan will give that to you. But you could just sleep with anyone instead of breaking this poor boy's heart!", she tutted and looked at me sternly. I put my head on the table and let out a long audible breath.
"You're wrong", I said and looked up at her, she raised her eyebrows.
"I don't like cheese, I love cheese." I said dead-serious and Freyja rolled her eyes.
"Don't distract. I know you're a good person and you shouldn't keep him on the back burner."
"I know", I said defeated. "How am I supposed to have a normal dating life when I'm like this?" I let my eyes wander through the cafeteria at all the seemingly happy and unbothered students enjoying their lunch.
"Uh, therapy?", Freyja suggested and patted my hand. "Or just give it a bit more time. Things will happen just right for you, you'll see." I bit my lip because I wanted to make a sarcastic comment but I still hadn't told Freyja about the Edoardo thing and that made things more complicated.

"Are you home tonight?", I asked, trying to shift the conversation in a more shallow direction.
"Yup, also alone, Nick has to work on a project."
"Will you two–", I started but was interrupted by Cecile sitting down at our table and saying "GUYS, do you already have tickets for–". She looked at me, whose mouth was still open and quickly apologized.
"No, all good, tell us!", I said and smiled at her.
"Okay so", she took a deep breath, "THE Halloween Party? Because of Corona there is a limited number of guests so I urge you to get your tickets fast!"
"Ohh fuck I almost forgot about it", Freyja said and I brushed nervously through my hair.
"God, imagine we would be too late to get tickets! We can't miss this party for nothing", I said and Freyja nodded profusely.
"Good, then let's get three right away, we can just set our names on a list via E-mail", Cecile said and fetched her phone out of her pocket.
"Wait, let me ask Stephan if he wants to come along", I mumbled and pulled my phone out as well.
"Ari!", Freyja said and looked at me vigorously.
"Chill out, I will...talk to him about my unstable emotional situation and all eventually but why shouldn't he come along?"
"Mhmh", she grumbled but didn't add any more comments.
"What's that about?", Cecile asked and I filled her in with the details of last night's events.
"Oh, Ari", Cecile sighed and looked at me pitifully.
"You don't have give me this look, so I got cock-blocked, whatever. Will get over it." I stood up and put on my coat and scarf. "I'll see you later!", I announced and smiled a bit half-heartedly at my friends before leaving the canteen. I was sure I could feel their confused looks in my back and Freyja's eye-roll.

***

"Why does alcohol make everything better?", I said and giggled, exhaling smoke from my cigarette and watched the fume vanish into the dark night.
"And other things an alcoholic would say", Freyja said and took a sip from her beer, smoking a cigarette as well.
"You can't talk", I countered and Freyja chuckled.
"No I guess I can't."
It was about 8pm and Freyja and I were sitting on our balcony, listening to music and having a beer. I didn't really feel like talking and was afraid we would enter dangerous territory if she asked me about my feelings regarding Stephan again, so I was doing some networking on my phone. Freyja was just recording a voice memo for Nick, talking quietly and smiling softly, when I got a message over Instagram.