Difficult Changes to Make

Chapter 3

Loki had been living with the Avengers for about two weeks now. They still didn't trust him. He really had changed, but they couldn't see past his villainous ways. It hurt him. A lot. The only ones who even attempted conversation with the god (besides Thor) was Steve and occasionally Bruce, which was surprising. The others avoided all contact possible with him, no matter the cost.

Loki sat alone on his room eating dinner. It tasted good; Steve was a better cook than Loki had guessed. He figured that it was better if he didn't intervene with the other's normal routine. Maybe they'd like him better if they forgot he was even here? That's why whenever he did leave his room, he made sure to not make a sound and do whatever he was doing swiftly, as to cut down on human contact.

Right now he wanted more food, but was unsure if the others had finished eating. That's why he swung by the library before getting more food. He browsed through the books until finding one that grabbed his interest. It seemed strange: parents sent their unwanted kids off to be killed and taken apart. Although they didn't see it as death, they saw it as "a soothing divided state." Loki decided to grab the four books of that series and head to the kitchen. He stopped when he heard voices.

He slowly put more pot roast onto his plate as he listened in on the conversation.

"I don't give a damn! For god's sake he brainwashed me! I don't like him, and honestly I don't think I ever will!" Clint's voice could be heard. "Hell Clint, none of us like him, you just have to try to be nice! He's trying to change, and it's the least we can do is be kind to him," Steve spoke. Thor stayed quiet for once.

"I don't trust him as far as I can throw 'em, and you all know I can't throw for shit," Tony said. "God Tony, we don't either, but attempt to be nice to him. You don't have to like him, none of us do really, just be nice," Natasha said.

Loki couldn't believe what he was hearing. He thought that they had started warming up to him, but apparently he was wrong. He felt worse than he had before, and just when he was starting to feel better about things too! He grabbed his plate and his books a bit too quickly causing him to fumble and drop the books with a loud crash. So much for not being noticed. The team stopped their conversation, their heads turning to look at him.

"Shit," Loki murmured trying to pick up his books. "Loki," Steve spoke getting up from his chair. "No no it's fine. You don't have to get up, just stay," he said gathering his books. "Did you hear-" but Steve already knew the answer. "No. I didn't hear a thing. You can resume what you where doing, I'm just going to go to my room."

"Loki," Steve tried again. "And don't bother checking up on me, I'll be fine." With that he disappeared before anyone could say anything. Loki sat in the corner of his room quietly. "JARVIS?" he called out. "Yes?" The AI answered back. "Could you lock my door and notify me if anyone tries to come?" he asked. "Certainly," JARVIS responded. Loki sighed, pulling his favorite chair into his favorite corner to sulk.

It was one of those chairs where you sit down and a bunch of stretchy, woven cables hold you up. He sunk down into the chair with a body pillow wrapped around the edge for extra comfort. Loki stared down at the book he held in his hand and ran his hand over the cover. It had the silhouette of someone with their hand out, but had the design of a fingerprint. It was strange indeed, yet oddly intriguing. He thought what better way to distract himself from his feelings than by reading. After all, a book was supposed to be calming entertainment.

Loki began reading Unwind and couldn't find the strength to stop. It was thrilling and unlike any Asguardian books he had ever read. Those books were all about things that had happened. But this, this was entirely from someone's imagination. It was amazing! He found he was quite fond with the characters. They were very likable and didn't deserve the hand they were dealt. He couldn't help but be reminded of himself by their own stories.

A stork was an unwanted child left on someone's doorstep. "In a way, I'm a stork as well," Loki thought, "If this were real, would Odin had signed for me to be unwound?" What was he doing? These thoughts shouldn't be in his head! It's a silly idea some mortal had written down on paper, no more. Oh but it was so much more. It took his mind away from what had happened earlier that night. It was only when JARVIS informed him of Captain Rodgers' presence that he remembered those events.

A knock came on the door followed by a voice. "Loki, are you alright? Listen, you shouldn't have heard what we said at dinner, and we shouldn't have said what we said. And for what it's worth, we're sorry." He waited for a response but didn't receive one, so he continued. "We'll try to get to know you, I promise. No more judging and no more lies." Loki laughed, "That's a lie right there." Steve grinned, "At least I know you heard me."