Taming the Wild

Chapter 3

“Yeah but I’m glad to say, I know how to ride a horse,” I snap at him before kicking Jezzy into a canter and circling the inside of the round pen.

Chad just looks at me surprised as I continue to do tricks and stay on the horse. I do a few more laps of the pen before bringing Jezzy to a walk and then stopping in front of Chad. He just stares at me as I sit there, waiting for him to say something.

“You’re actually good, where did you learn to ride?”

“My dad before he,” my voice falters and I just stop talking.

Thinking about how my dad used to take me horseback riding before he died, I slide off Jezzy, throw Chad the reins and walk off. I hug my elbows and look down at the ground as I stalk off towards one of the barns. Before I know it, I find myself sitting in the shadows behind the farthest barn.

I listen as footsteps approach the side of the barn. Looking out of the corner of my eye, I see a pair of cowboy boots covered in dust and manure. Closing my eyes, I lean my head against the barn wall as I wait for the person to go away. Instead, I hear him sit down beside me. Sighing, I barely open my eyes and turn my head to see Chad.

“What do you want?” I ask him irritated as I pinch my nose.

“I just wanted to know why you just kind of left.”

“How’d you know where I was?”

“A lot of people come here to think, thought you might like it.”

“Okay,” I mumble.

“I saw you looking at the horse in the field near the round pen.”

“So?”

“That’s Scar, they must have put him outside during lunch.”

“Okay,” I say slowly as I open my eyes and look at the horses in the field in front of us.

“So, if you don’t mind me asking, why did you just leave me standing there?” Chad questions me softly.

“I do mind,” I loudly state as a single tear rolls down my cheek. I wipe it away before he notices it.

“Okay, if you want to talk, I’ll be in the hay loft, above this barn, come find me if you need me,” Chad tells me sincerely before walking away.

Once I know he is gone, I bury my head in my hands and pull my knees to my chest. I silently cry into my hands as I remember the way my parents smiled and laughed, acting like everything in the world was good and the bad did not exist. I remember the comforting warmth they brought me when their arms wrapped around me. I remember everything about them and it kills me on the inside knowing that I will never be able to see them again or feel the warmth of their hugs.

I feel an arm snake around my shoulders and then I am being pulled against him. He is running his hand through my hair soothingly. From the smell, I can tell it is my uncle, which makes me cry even more. My Uncle Marley and dad were brothers, twin brothers almost, only a couple years apart but they looked almost identical. My dad was a tad shorter then my uncle, but they had the same hair and eyes.

“It’s okay, Dyl, just let it out,” my uncle says soothingly into my ear as I cry for the first time since the funerals.

“I miss them so much,” I choke out as I blink back the rest of the tears and wipe the existing ones from my face.

“I know, I miss them too, they were good people.”

“But out of everyone in the world, why them? Why?” I cry out in anger burying my head in my hands again.

“I don’t know Dylan, I just don’t know.”

We sit there for a few more minutes before I wipe my face and eyes clean. I look up at my uncle Marley and give him a sad smile. He helps me up and hugs me before telling me that I can do what I want for the rest of the day instead of working. I thank him and then take a few minutes to re-collect myself before heading towards the front door of the barn to find Chad.

Walking in the barn, I look around and find a sturdy looking ladder leading up to a hole in the ceiling. I climb the ladder carefully to make sure I do not lose my footing. Once I pop my head through the square hole, I see Chad dangling his legs out of a space in the wall where you can slide a door back and forth to close it.

I pull the rest of my body through the hole and stand up. Carefully, I make my way across the hay bales and sit down beside Chad, letting my legs dangle out the space too. We just sit there for a few minutes in silence as I stare out into the field, noticing the lone horse again.

“I knew you would come up here,” Chad states.

“And how did you know this?”

“I don’t know, your mask just doesn’t fool me I guess,” Chad shrugs and I look at him.

“What are you talking about?”

“I know you; you’re not as tough as you act. I see right through the whole I-don’t-care-about-anything-or-anyone attitude.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” I say as I cross my arms over my chest and look to my side, away from Chad.

“Whatever you say, but I have you figured out.”

“Sure you do,” I roll my eyes before popping my bubblegum a couple times.

“So, how long are you staying?” Chad asks after a few minutes of us sitting in silence.

I sit there silent, thinking, not knowing what to say. “I don’t know,” I finally confess.

“How don’t you know?”

“I just don’t alright?” I snap at him as anger boils inside me, threatening to explode.

“Alright, alright, don’t need to rip my head off.”

“Sorry,” I let out a deep breath and pinch the bridge of my nose.

Chad leaves me to myself for a few minutes later noticing my change in moods. I sit up there, dangling my feet out of the window for hours by myself. The whole time, I am just watching the horse run from one end of the field to the other.