I need you

Chapter 19

Damian's POV:

The past few months have been frustrating. Extremely frustrating. The heathens have been worse than usual. They say that I'm more irritable than before, that I'm less patient, that I'm acting like I did when mother left me here.

I head to the Batcave to train. I spend most of my spare time in there. My room has too many reminders of the b*tch that ghosted me a few months back. I don't care anymore.

I break the first of many punching bags and exchange it for a new one.

I've gotten a lot stronger. Nearly killed Todd a few times and broke Grayson's arm a month ago. Father says that I can't go the gala because of it. Not like I wanted to go anyway. I'll be patrolling with Kent. He doesn't trust me to not break anything.

Second bag. Exchange it for a new one.

I sometimes wonder why she stopped answering. Why, when I thought everything was going well, she just ghosted me. Maybe she wanted to avoid me. Maybe I was a fucking Summer fling. She didn't act like the harlots at school. Maybe it's because she didn't know who I was.

Third bag. I change stations and train with my katana.

While training with my katana, my mind goes blank. I let my frustration out. The anger that keeps building up inside of me slowly leaves my body with every swing.

It feels nice.

°Time skip°

After training with my katana, I went patrolling. I stopped a few robberies, but nothing really interesting.

I went to bed and quickly fell asleep.

I woke up in the morning, at a normal time and went downstairs for some breakfast. Father and Grayson were already there. They were talking about tonight's gala. I just ate my breakfast and left. I don't like these events and I'm not going anyway. I go to my room to get ready for the day : I shower, brush my teeth, get dressed, etc.

°Time skip°

It's the middle of the afternoon and Kent is at the front door. Pennyworth let him in and sent him to my room. I was waiting for him in front of my room.

We discussed random stuff until it was time to patrol. We left quickly.

Patrol was chaotic.

There were many robberies, attacks... We barely made it back two hours after the last guests left.

Kent went home quite quickly. We weren't supposed to get back this late and Jon was really late, he needed to get back as soon as possible.

I get ready for bed. I'm exhausted, but I can't fall asleep. I'm lying in my bed, staring at the ceiling. I can't sleep, but there are too many drawings, sketches and paintings of someone I would rather forget on the walls. I don't want to see them.

I finally build up the courage to get up and grab a sketchbook. An empty one. I leave my room and find a nice, quiet space to draw. I draw random stuff. Landscapes, random people, weapons, eyes, noses, faces, mouths, hands, poses...

At some point, I wasn't even looking at what I was drawing. I am looking outside. At the stars, at the city, etc...
I look out the window for about an hour or so. At some point, I look down at my sketchbook and freeze.

I drew her. I drew Ange- Marinette.

Why did I draw her?

I tear the page into tiny pieces.

I hate how my mind always seems to wander back to her. No matter where I am or what I am doing, my mind always wanders back to her.

Why did she stop responding?
Did she kill herself? I saw all of those scars on her forearms...
Maybe I did something wrong? I don't think so...
Maybe I should have searched for her when she stopped responding... No, if she doesn't want to speak to me, it's her choice, not mine.

I hate not knowing. I feel the need to punch something, so I punch the wall, leaving a hole the size of my fist behind.

I get up and go to the batcave. No one in sight. I walk to the batcomputer and start looking for her. I type in her phone number and name and let the computer do its job. It says that it may take up to an hour because I don't want the others to be able to know that I used the computer for this.

While waiting, I decide to go to a training station.

°Time skip°

Fifty minutes have passed and I'm about to check the search results, when I hear someone approach. I quickly terminate the search, turn off the computer and hide. Drake is here with a giant cup of coffee. I soon make my way out of the cave without Drake noticing before going back to bed.

I was so close to getting an answer.

I fall asleep feeling extremely frustrated.

AN: Sorry for how short the chapter is. I'm going to Germany tomorrow. The next chapter might take some time.